the new as it were edition
/brit/
is this the new as it were
aye
That's the full 90 minutes of cardiotoil complete. The day begins now. Average speed of 30km/hr or so, not too bad for the long ride. The muscles have been worked. The blood has been pumped. Slight cardiac drift in the last half an hour with an increase in perceived effort, but that's expected given the duration and lack of correct fuelling mid-ride. Get the lactate cleared. Get the glycogen restored. Get a clue. What are you waiting for? Start doing some exercise.
*flies through the thread at 100000000000000 mile an hour*
*rapes you*
*rapes you*
When and why did instagram become so racist?
this general is for british people, yet it was not made by a brit, really makes you think
imagine the doppler effect rape noises
*rapes you*
fuck up mutt
scwerawkt
you're a black bastard
that's absolutely correct
*rapes you but turns you gay before so that you enjoy it*
that's 14.92 million times the speed of light!
at that speed it would take about 624,000 years to cross the observable universe.
The anti-semitism on there is really bad :/
how do you know i'm not an expat?
raping myself so hard my body distorts into a grotesque ouroboros shape
s
c
pocasts got their name from ipods and yet ipods arent even a thing anymore
baudrillard proved right AGAIN
r
Mumberg still treats me like a child even though I turn 25 next month. She buys clothes for me, cooks for me, spends as much on me at Christmas and birthdays as she did when I was little, does all my washing and cleans my room. Must be her way of coping with the passage of time, I think she was happiest when she was a mum of little children.
Today is my rest day x
more like bald retard
scrandy zaltzman
if i'm chatting to a girl and she keeps sending me selfies unprompted does it mean i'm in there?
don't know
sucking a fanta berry
feeling rather nauseated after that heroin i injected earlier
not sure
Aren’t you ashamed?
proof pic or blog on 'cism
thinking its time to get stoned and wander around in skyrim for five hours straight again
love a bit of mouldy pus on a cracker x
Means she doesn't like you pal send her my way x
imperial or stormcloak
how could i prove it? why is it hard for you to believe that someone here is a junkie degenerate?
Why would I be?
stormcloak, not because i'm particularly invested in their cause but because i like LARPing as a racist nord going around murdering every high elf i see
by taking a pic of the used needle you actual mong
I don't even think you're lying about the heroin but your defensiveness is strange
whenever I play a nord I want to rape male wood elves and make them my little bitch
heroin shmeroin
:3
For being a grown man living off your mother. Do you even have a job?
raping niggers
34 with no gf
My dreams of being a family man are over. Even if I had kids of my own I would likely be at least 40.
fuckiong scrmaeign
cant spell heroin without hero
ok
No worse pain than loving a girl who won't ever love you back. I am on the ropes.
cute oriental women will save us bro
i don't see how this proves anything but if you insist
Same here minus the buying clothes or spending lots, but I'm a couple years older.
love the smell of secondhand smoke and petrol
just manifest that you're 24 in your own head and eventually you'll believe it and your body will placeabo itself into being 10 years younger
:3
No. I have a job and I don’t leech off my mum. My sister also lives at home and we both help her with expenses. I just don’t see the point in moving out just for the sake of it. We live in London as well so if I moved out I would probably just end up sharing a place with strangers so what’s the point?
kill the boer kill the farmer
This shit pops
Mental
your life is FUCKED lad
no shit
*Lust For Life starts playing at high volume*
is it much better than snorting then?
It's over for vapecucks
triangulating this smackheads exact position from the reflections on his heroin spoon
I wouldn't mind that.
Y-yeah haha...
meekest closeted nonce on this nonce sting
he offers to make the noncehunters a cup of tea
What?
definitely more bang for your buck, kind of an arseache though
get them hanged drawn and quartered
some brown cunt just tried to use my debit card what are they like
If you were given you £20k in cash do you believe you would be able to make £1k a week off it?
Yessir.
nah you'll get the routine streamlined and down pat soon enough
then you'll be dead!
Scots?
support migrant businesses
No
Christ. Did you do it?
to be honest i don't enjoy heroin that much, prefer pills, once i finish off this stash i've got i think i'll pack it in
tbf my stepdad did heroin for most of his adult life and only died at 60 from hitting an artery and bleeding out on his own in his flat until the stench of his corpse drew attention
Wrestler..
This, but the exact opposite
Most healthy Scottish man
wdym by pills? like percs or whatever? you get them online?
would perhaps consider ruining my already miserable life also
Enjoy it.
tapentadol, i can get loads of them really cheap
What?
Why not?
ffs i thought this egyptian schizo/bot got banned
Why are you throwing your life away. What a dumb idea
What?
I know how to get dihyrodocodeine, that any good?
im waiting for my man
It’s mousenonce
i'm not throwing it away, opioids genuinely help me function better at my job (not the heroin though, that's just experimenting)
You are a piece of shit, yes.
no idea, never tried it
When?
mad how much of cooking instructions is pure waste of time
preheat your oven
baste
let rest
it's not a time wasted
:(
What?
The outside texture is always shit if you don't preheat and try to fudge it with extra minutes
This. I do most of my cooking in the air fryer now as well and pre heating is defo pointless
air fryer solves this
poof
just want sxyprn back de lads
When??
my EU4 brazil game absolutely imploded in the space of a year. 6 hours wasted
sent that gastronomical gaylord galloping
what happened to it? i stopped using it after the download function changed the file type to .mov or whatever it was instead of mp4
Rorke lurching over his dinner plate of turkey dinosaurs with a frown after realising the underside didn't crisp up properly because he couldn't be bothered to preheat the oven
When???
thinking about that egg lad from yesterday eating his 10 eggs a day
involved in racism
Why are turkey dinosaurs and smiley faces so good though?
When?
NOOOOO YOU CAN'T EAT THE SAME AS ME BUT IN A FUN SHAPE
I kill Arabs not the opposite. Huh?
might shave my head to flex on all the baldfags
as if to say "yeah i could have hair if i wanted to, but i choose not to"
not at all
men know how to follow instructions
know who doesn't? women and darkies
get them drank
alright baldingbutdoesntwanttoadmititlad
Wasted.
mmhmm
wish I could shave my head since it's so easy to maintain but I have a small round head and I'd look like a twink karl pilkington
sister popped out her son when she was 35 and the little fella turned out normal enough so there is some hope for you lot in your 30's with no gf and no children
Doing a France run atm. Got some Irish state and Scotland as vassals so England is cockblocked. Iberia is divided. HRE and their massive coalitions are the only thing me and a new rome.
want to do a womans vagina
I'll be throwing Diego onto a pub roof in Primrose Hill this evening
Why?
how old is he now?
whatever you'd like to tell yourself m8
my hair unironically looks like this
starmer is anti gamer
did anyone else witness this interaction or experienced this interaction in primary school?
boy, acting silly. girl says "you're not funny". boy responds "i wasn't trying to be!".
i felt like that was common. anyone else?
5 and seems to have avoided the 'tism just a regular little guy
double fraiser in a day, nice work /brit/
Sir Anti Gamer
rummaging through a compost bin and eating fistfuls of worms
mad to think that even the prettiest most angelic girls you see all do several smelly farts per day and also eject logs of smelly slimyt shit from their bumholes on a daily or near-daily basis
When?
are you autistic
remember watching fraiser on channel 4 in the morning eating my bowl of rice crispies before heading to secondary
simpler days so they were lads
The idea that women just have retarded and autistic children past 30 is ridiculous desu
the response was usually 'I know you aren't but what am I?'
that's a good age, they start getting interests
What?
can't say i've ever noticed that
GAMER PRIDE
WORLD WIDE
had to whip the big fan out for the first time this year
I know you aren't but what am I?
might cook up another batch of heroin solution to stick in my arm
Not really
lettuce begin
nah mate if you don't have a child with a woman who is 18 and running through the wheat field its over the child will never survive the autism
try cooking up a clue instead
Sir Play Station
Wouldn't mind trying heroin tbf
Brits made the perfect music for opioids use too with space rock
why don't you cook up a clue instead
When??
got some cheap nasty ham slices from corner shop that I'll be scranning the fuck out of
Nah but the chances go up and it becomes harder to conceive.
bodied that addict freak
you're not funny
rorke never having sex... EVER
i'm not joking
inane drivel
Sir Sega Megadrive
might get on the beer and the whisky
the source engine was like a father to me
When???
ktim
Not enjoying alcohol as much these days
asinine soliloquies
he was a shagger
When?
Have you tried drinking more?
The show is mostly him not being a shagger and continually being humiliated
Might drink tonight
Wha's the name of that one incel YouTube channel again? He releases videos every Friday but I can't seem to remember it
seasideMARK
charlie veitch
lost your login details mate?
diego?
When????
doxxable info
banging down on my desk with both fists while howling
asmongold
friendlyjordies?
oops you're manually breathing
gay porn?
look at all those chav mongs wow
youtube.com
spell it fraiser one more time
Refusing to breathe
no I don't think I will look
When??
Found it, Rehab Room, thanks for the help shaggers
wrong again. im posting from hospital rn
Fascinating how utter shite my country's general is
So many references to people I never heard of and shitty inside jokes
At least /brit/ is somewhat understandable to the average outsider
unsubbed to billy over this. imagine defending this pondlife
gay porn nigger poo wank arse
booted that runt into orbit
Champions league tonight
there's plenty of autistic dollhouse shit here too tbf
When?
yep excellent post this
got the toilfu a present from my vacation and she loved it
this thread is just
poo
rorke doing a poo
poo wank
screaming
bradley_walsh.png
Rorke unmasked
When???
hey look guys
the deindustrialization of europe is a brilliant way to get back at trump
dont tell me they actually believe this...
Dangerous day to be a Peroni...
190 aisha Rorke Diego Spainnonce sacked tranny mousenonce carlybender Dtfic brick heathermong canslad trannyspammer bradleymong
if I worked hard I could achieve this
Marks & Spencer's online orders reopened. Result.
doesn't hit the same as when half of this list is just you and your dogshit forced gimmicks
Tarquin my son
I wish I wasn't autistic I wish I wasn't born
poostein scratching at my back door like a puppy begging to be let out
Hate how so many topics of discussion are off limits with women.
If you broach any topic that upsets their sensibilities or bring up anything worth talking about like philosophy, politics, music, art, culture they will inevitably get offended or get bored. All my conversations with them end up being about trivial things like food or whatever zogslop Netflix has come out with recently.
ummy
girls <3
2 dogshit yank zingers back to back
Can't believe this thing just reached through my window earlier and grabbed me with his massive hand like King Kong while Italians went oooooh ooooh ooooooh like something out of a wicker man rip off. I was actually frozen in shock
You mean from betting or something?
christ almighty imagine telling on yourself like this
XD
all the best yank comedians are black
every black comedian in the UK is fucking dogshite
mad that aye?
There is less racism here so it's not funny
scremaign
might go to church tomorrow, while high on heroin naturally
When?
bbcs in this country are notoriously unfunny
what black yank comedians do you like?
big fan of hannibal buress and michael che myself
dont understand why you'd want to go and see kaleb cooper
he's a farmhand, what is his show even going to be about?
cuban girls are so pretty
Dave chapelle
When??
rorke queuing up for casual TF2 in 2025
look the mirror hate my face
Look at my body hate it
Look into my mind I hate my personality
I hate being a autistic freak
might start doing push ups to see if it cures my menthol shelves
well that goes without saying don't it
farming I imagine
When???
yeah why are black brits so unfunny
I’d say on average brits are funnier than white Americans
but your blacks are just cringe. Our blacks have a natural primitive observational humor
GEORGE FLOYD - I CAN'T BREATHE
GEORGE TROID - I CAN'T BREED
GEORGE FOID - I CAN'T FIND CHAD
cuba's a very racially diverse place, most cubans are brown and hideous
When????
normies will gobble up any old shite
they are slaves
george floyd jokes in big may 2025
let it go unc
I lost my virginity to a fat girl and all my mates made fun of me
how was it over there?
MSC!
I heard that your body burns the same amount of calories in a day whether you work out or not. If you don't it will just be spent on nervous energy so yeah you should do.
never shagged a fat girl personally only shagged skinny birds
feel like I've barely lived
When?
like time travelling to the 1960s
They’re all kind of sweaty and most fat girls don’t even have big asses anyway
sovl
I do not like a single aspect of myself I hate how people will say I am attractive or somewhat charming but I find them to be full of shit
They’re all kind of sweaty
ha ha how horrible I'd hate that ha ha
When??
is it true that there is basically no scran available other than sandwiches and weird pasta slop dishes
Many such cases?
I felt bad after it. Embarrassed. I didn’t see her again she texted me a few times
chris rock desu
I I I I me me me myself myself
shut the FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
pretty horrible of you lad least you could have done is text her back and say you'd prefer to stay friends
When???
Actually mental how we are edging closer and closer to irreversible climate apocalypse and no one really seems to care
great post
You had me at edging
i welcome it
actually mental how its all made up
rubbish
yh
pretty much
the resorts however have very nice scran available, cuba leans pretty heavily on tourism because they've got bugger all else to prop up their economy
lubed up finger is teetering dangerously close to my puckered rim lads
yeah true that
*ignores that every year gets hotter and hotter*
When????
the rich and elite will be fine so whats the problem?
can't be if greta abandoned it
I can think of something else that’s getting hotter and hotter
Actually mental how we are edging
that summer leftypol
it's called summer mate
*rapes you*
When?
get this gormless freak off my screen
good gravy
dan schneider would NOT have allowed this to fly
yeah true that
*ignores that every summer gets hotter and hotter than the last one*
head like a f'n butternut squash that
been getting into kitkats as of late
lovely bit of chocolate
SFW board mate
dont post a pic of her then idiot
You can't search for anything specific anymore on twitter, if you want to find an old tweet of yours it just surfaces slop from top accounts and verified jeets that has a similar reference, mental how much musk has ruined that site
Chocolate bars are all processed junk
anglo genes are mental lol
your mum processed my junk
We are in record drought here and it's dawned on me my region will be fucked economically if we keep warming up and these droughts become more frequent. Considering buying an investment property in Tasmania as a hedge or my children will inherit a house in a ghost town.
recycle
my mum had breast cancer
i'd make the new but i've just injected some heroin and can barely wield a keyboard
tasmania?
rather go to south america than africa if i had to choose
paraguay or something