be American
live in a literal paradise
"oh no this place sucks so much, it's a living hell, I need to move to little town Shitholistan in Postsovietstan, I'll be accepted and feel at home there"
get paid 2000 USD for flipping burgers without a degree
"oh no this is so humiliating, I should be passing 10 years at college and move overseas to work 9-21 in a slave company in Tokyo for 1000 USD and live in a bug cage!"
get anything you want from anywhere in the world at your home's door just by using an app
"oh no this is so dehumanizing and dystopic, I should have only one product choice to buy and be forced to go in person to different stores kms away to buy them!"
get a free penis tune up at birth
"oh no my life is ruined, I will never be able to stuff doritos inside my penis and mix them with cheese and get STDs like true men do! This is the end!"
Why are they like this?