/brit/

/brit/

NO Peters

catobergeonamadone

Would love to go back then with a bunch of youtube compilation videos.
I bet they'd all go mad for it.

wahey! look at him go

Got invited to a cocktail party but I'm so runtish that I will probably make an excuse so people don't have to see me

If I don’t have this life by 30 I’m killing myself
I have 8 years

LGBTQ = PAEDO

I dislike adult social events where you're expected to wear smart clothes and pretend to be nice to everybody. I miss house parties where I could snort drugs and drink cans until vomiting and falling asleep.

Dickwinson.

Thirsty Thursday!!

Woggle

They are called gaff parties

What's a face?

alright, fuck this, what's the filter for egypt that I have to put in ublock?

I think I have permanently ruined my bastarding life.

grow up

brits are a cruel people, spend a few years abroad in a sunny area and you will realize we have an evil soul here

Anon Babble.org##.postContainer.replyContainer:has(.flag-eg)

yeah sure

might have a wank to some blacked

only due to the shite weather we get though

we're not inherently evil, the sun cures it during the summer

How to put it?

We have become greedy
All the good without the bad, is a common mantra

knocking on someones door to ask if caberge can come out to play

Prohibition?

I have been forbidden from typical social norms.

Piss Dogs (unofficial name) - Footage of the man urinating on two dogs before beating them,[2] though the dogs' fate and where the footage took place remain disclosed.

Just who we are mate

bricks.

quite frankly, hate everything, and everything, and myself, and wish we'd all just fuck off.

beter grivin

Go to the west.

Large Ange

17th in the PL. 21 losses. Embarrassing and disgraceful.

Grow up

Life conditions.

No. Age is just a number.

haha bullocks.

put my old address on a parcel and the bastard royal mail won't let me change the address, instead they have tried to deliver it there twice unsuccessfully and now I have to collect the fucking thing on saturday

Could they be more wrong?

greek lois griffin be like pita

Roam.

Champions League, silverware, and a far richer European history than Arsenal. Sounds good to me!

thats you done then

Utter mong

I hate you

youtu.be/8_hs8Km4-Eg?t=22

Genuinely feel bad for you

The world is big for me, sir.

The British one.

My prospective sex toy orderberg:

6 inch dildo

I might get a bigger one after just in case I fuck a dude with a huge dick, but I generally prefer smaller dicks.

butt plug

vibrating butt massager

another vibrating butt massager that's a different size

masturbator

lots of lube xD

Never had sex with a dude I intend on dating this year. I'm more gay than not obviously. Men are more fun I think.

Ulter.

Used to love going out for the mad one, get the packet in, few bars, a club, back to someone's for afters until 6am.
31 now and the idea of doing that sounds like pure shite.

how are you going to look past the pooey hairy arsehole conundrum or does it just not really bother you lot

Slavic

merking a poo

uk niggas be like boycott israel and then spend their entire pay packet supporting colombian and mexican drug cartels

Ya bastard.

katy cant wait to open cronem's snap during break time

yeah?

Appreciate it mate, got a massive hangover this morning and I had to go to work :(

Becomes Dexter.

Was real.

You prep for it. You'll fast for about a day and then clean. I shave my arse and balls anyway.

Anal isn't 'dirty', my ass is probably cleaner than yours ever has been. And the pleasure from anal is just incomparable.

Am I seeing t right now?

youtube.com/watch?v=iKkpmCdf1Mo

Sucking my dick.

yeah hard to get much pooier and hairier than my particular arse

all these wastemen walking around north london with no UCL trophies. couldnt be me

So you prep your bum wanks one day in advance?
Is it worth the prep time, fasting and all that?

job applications will be the death of me

any hot-keys placed from 5 and up just don't get used simple as that
too far

yeah

yeah

when I was in uni one of my flatmates had a dildo collection under his bed and one night he was out so we had a look at it and some of them were covered in dried shit

What the fuck are you talking about?

Shame literally no one cares about it though

Wank me off Polak XD

Rorke doing the viral trends on Xitter and Rumble

Anyone in Bristol for a Crystal?

Say one thing true.

youtube.com/watch?v=OGNZUTUo1iE&ab_channel=Darrenzak

anal sex is runtish and disgusting if youre gay just rub your willies together or something

Do you think so too?

Depends on your sexual orientation firstly. The idea of getting fucked is just ogasmic for me. Having a dude control you and fuck you hard, there's no comparison. But if you're straight, you can get orgasms you could never imagine if you had a prostate massager.

That slips in, hugs your prostate and most vibrate too so it stimulates you. Huge amount of nerve endings in the butt. I don't know why the prostate gives insane organs though. But it's full body and your ass feels better than your dick when you cum. It's actually insane.

I'd keep it once a week though because it's intense and your butt is a bit sensitive. Look into it. Heavenly.

these days its all the rage for the top to hump his willy into the bottoms little willy they call it 'sounding'

The Acts of Union 1707 refer to both England and Scotland as a "part" of a united kingdom of Great Britain.

The Acts of Union 1800 use "part" in the same way to refer to England and Scotland. However, they use the word "country" to describe Great Britain and Ireland respectively, when describing trade between them.

Lazy gays are disgusting

1:1.

anal niggas always be proselytising

ktim

this is why I will always live alone, so some nosey bastard who doesnt have anything better to do will invade my privacy and look through my shit.

I appreciate your response but I certainly shan't "look into it"

You live alone so you can bumwank all day you disgusting gay freak

Arsh XD.

heroin doesn't feel THAT good
nice to relax on but hardly worth destroying your life over

The idea of getting fucked is just ogasmic for me.

sir bum wanker

thinking of cutting down a bit?

Ok, Polak. Something.

no i dont shove stuff up my arse or have a dildo collection.

having someone invade my privacy is giving me the ick.

Beating tf out of it.

I wish I were never born

heavy one tha

how can we be sure unless we give your bedroom a thorough inspection

guess we'll never know.

Ok, I am sorry.

I need a career coach
to do everything for me
I've clearly arsed everything up for myself

not really, i take a manageable amount, it's well within my budget and doesn't affect my personal or professional responsibilities in the slightest
and before you say it's unsustainable and my tolerance will increase and fuck me over, i've been in this situation for 3 years and have had it under control the whole time

Just a thought.

all London clubs combined have only ever won TWO Champions Leagues

London has a population of 8m

Arsenal have never even made it to a final

Liverpool and Manchester combined have 10 Champions Leagues

combined populations of just over 1m

Why are Northerners the GOATs of football? Just more passion?

/brit/ being close minded on anal and prostate masturbation is cutting your nose to spite your face. It is unbelievable in terms of pleasure and excitement.

How to combine?

poo mate. nuffsaid.

you know the players aren't all locals yeah

ive shoved some things up my arse before but didnt think it felt very nice and it made me need to wee loads

of course i like a knob up the arse as much as the next man

a bisexual man is a fully optimised man

Take my lunch box.

i do it like once a month, it's alright nothing to write home about

In bed. Farting.

Wondering.

I tried it once but felt horrible just felt like I was going to shit myself
Grim vile stuff

never getting a skilled job again
totally fucked it all up out the fucking window

We literally have questions marks there.

BORISWAVE
O
R
I
S
W
A
V
E

wet, cold, and rather displeased with this weather
however, my internship has become an apprenticeship starting in june so get bloody in

i dont finger my battyhole anymore because it gets sore. not even joking and im not gay

as long as feelings aren't involved, it's not gay

Becomes gay.

IF YOU DONT FINGER YOUR ARSEHOLE IT MEANS YOUR SECRETLY A BATTY BOY

lucky
i am blacklisted from all employers

not bent or anything but think i'll look into getting my arsehole filled in by some bloke because it sounds heavenly

what kind of toil you getting into?

I am a relativist

Bumb it.

you what now
sheet metal smith, old trade from the 1300’s or something — it’s very fun

relativing to what?

thinking of taking mumberg's poodle to the company bbq next week because he's a chick magnet

Call it a dirty surprise.

good lad
corrr, luv some french food

Least you had a job im 23 and never had one

very masculine that, i occasionally do a bit of metalwork as part of my job and it's always my favourite part

Wait wait wait

fizzy grapefruit tangerine lavender lemonade

oh haha we were reading that like you wanted to barbecue him kek
put another mutt on the barbie haha

truth

Gonna put some shrimps on the Barbie mate?

my great grandfather got taken captive by turks at gallipoli and they showed him two girls pooing together on the floor with not much toilet paper there and told them that orangutans are actually apes not monkeys in the pub garden they were keeping him captive in and then he just walked away

FAQ's about anal play

it hurts

It shouldn't, you need to learn to prep properly

it's dirty

Clean and fast before

it doesn't feel good

You haven't hit the right sports for long enough, use more lube

it's gay

Sure whatever, it's your body and your pleasure

Anal gives amazing pleasure you just have to do it properly.

Polack analyze.

thought truth was absolute, like 2+2=4

would you let a 10 inch ngubu bum you?

Absolutely wild how easily I coom to Angela White joi
Gorgeous hambeast

having slow roasted pork ribs i think, maybe some brisket and smoked sausages

just copped two new Jellycats for the mrs, she loves those fun little guys

yeah

There was once a man named Maloney
Who was plagued by calls - all of them phoney
He would get so irate
Trying to get things all straight
While soundboards fed him baloney.

never had one

thought about looking for one if you want one?
third worlders who cant even speak english manage to get jobs in this country.

love working with metal, could never do as a carpenter or such — wood’s just not that interesting to me

Arsenal were in the 2006 final were Barca won with an offside goal

I applied to a lot last year but since I have no employment history and only gcses no one gets back to me

rorke leading 400 armed white protestant men of good character into Westminster, dissolving parliament and declaring a populist dictatorship for and by the people

C'mon.

you doing stuff like smelting and forging and casting like an old school blacksmith?

Another one of this for the chin I guess.

Fosters, good call!

Really?

ebb bell tag
or
babble gelt
or
veg talley
or
galley tv

we all good?

we generally don't drink that stuff but i occasionally see it in bottleos and pick it up as a curiosity, it's not bad tbf

literally what the fuck in the point in eco mode it uses the same amount of petrol anyway

No, I don't think so.

good for the economy

going to get a right bollocking from the big boss later

thank god diabetes exists otherwise i'd have no false pretence to use when i'm picking up needles from the chemist for my smack

Shit Polack.

think it's nice that spurs won a thing. might go to the parade tomorrow.

I am not going to lose, no.

what'd you do to set off toilberg this time?

nah, would love to try it though, we work with sheet metal mainly (0,6-1mm thick), it’s aimed maily at roofs, ventilation, chimneys, and the such
know i posted this before, but all the red is sheet metal

C'mon.

didnt go to a stupid staff event

If you asked AI to generate a succubus it would look like her
She genuinely looks like she spawned from hell to drain the cocks and balls of any man willing to sell his soul to the devil for a dirty rotten shag

Then you know war is war

ever watch videos of people making swords and stuff? love watching a skilled craftsman ply his trade me, probably way more of an arseache than it looks

not convinced she's a real flight attendant

something about her reminds me of a marine mammal like a whale or large fish

Stop.

aye, love and i mean LOVE watching blacksmiths forging their little damascus bollock daggers and the like

she spawned from hell to drain the cocks and balls of any man willing to sell his soul to the devil for a dirty rotten shag

Well.... would you?
She definitely made something fly up.
She's perfect

kick off

So, this is rorke

Polack!!!

um

not a huge fan of angela white, she's got kind of an ugly fanny and desperately needs some kind of tasteful pubic arrangement
also fucks too many negroes and doesn't do nearly enough creampie scenes (i think she's only done like one in her whole career despite being in thousands of films)

you're also not a fan of sex i take it

Bloody Scots
They're all like this you know

fucks too many negroes

only congolese cock can handle her now

need a plain gf with hairy armpits and a fat meaty pussy and uhh

You ass, Jason

he cute!

donkey

but how

cringe

mumstein used to be a big bruce springsteen fan until 2016 when he endorsed hillary clinton for president
people are too political these days aren't they

I pack a chainsaw

Let's fight Polack

me? I pay £9 for some little asian fella to drop my shopping off at my door. pocket change for a guy like me

Too much?

Hope the sex toy store have responded to my support ticket. Keen to get my anal toys this week.

3pm
16

a lot of cats look like theyre wearing make up

they are

far too old

*scratch scratch scratch*

Do gay freaks know that all normal people utterly despise them

is aldi pronounced al-dee or ol-dee

bro woke up at midday and immediately hopped on brit to post pedophilic bbc spam

ALL DIE

eee what a lovely lad

imagine the smell of their feet

All-die

Impressive. Shut it pathetic!

White girls want this in their lives

I love you very much

Would like to try hippo meat

Russian.

Did you know that every 'white' South African has approximately 8% non-white DNA? Yeah, I too was shocked when I read it. Apparently a lot of them mixed with Africans as well as Asian migrants in the 19th century. They gradually passed as white and mixed with pure whites, and eventually all the white population was tainted with non-white DNA.
A similar thing happened in the southern United States.

young

year 9
laddered tights

Big all the way.

Imagine the smell of their pussies at 3pm. I don't imagine they've showered since yesterday

i am john malkovich

i am john mcenroe

i am john mccafee

um
corrr

youtube.com/watch?v=lpS5mLsLNvI

always at least two schizos present in /brit/ posting their schizo rubbish

par for the course these days

oooh sweet jesus she's going to hurt in the morning

Stupid.. Huh???

been captivated by bronze casting lately myself, mad how it was THE metal for most of documented human history

Sheridan is back from the shop with Trojans

XD

any normal lads in?

u bought di cocoa butter

soft downy fupa

I’m nice and normal

Delusional.

reckon i'm the most normal lad in /brit/

i watch a lot of ramsay's kitchen nightmares when i'm hungry and the food that ramsay says is disgusting looks lush to my ravenous eyes

what are your normal credentials

Bro gave birth to me.

got my bum on my willy and my willy on my bum

He way exaggerates how bad some of the food is

Got my daily Thai, and the ladies that run the stall thanked me as one for coming every day, and bowed. Never had a Paki or a Negroid-Bantoid thank me, let alone bow to me. Do better shitskins!

Fried Chicken.

Thai people are very submissive and deferential ime

got a job

occasionally see friends

nice family life

not addicted to substances

not racist

don't spam gimmicks/trannies/scat/porn

common complaints are that it's "bland" in which case he should just add some fucking salt from the shaker right in front of him, or that it's greasy or that the dough is undercooked, neither of which would bother me that much

Gf status?

Yeah.

As they should be. I respect them more for it, give them tips, am more forthcoming with praise. Havent bought from a Paki or African business in a decade me.

prefer not to say

Have you guys seen the new Google Veo AI video generation? Looks photorealistic and also has speech and sound

Can’t wait to make some funny cuck spam with that

what about Indian ppl?

Sending their sneaky kids to private school

FUCK YOU!!!

someone go ahead and make the new yeah?