/brit/

acorn woodpecker

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first for me

yum yum yum yum yum

Just at the gym

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I don't think I'd consider British to be an ethnicity, I'd consider it a nationality

good for you

i wear it as a badge of honor

that's austria in the filter then

He’s right

always wanted to know the back story to this

why are they in a photography studio

why did they poo on the floor

how did they synchronise their poos

why did they use so little paper

why did they do it

im 20 stone
6 ft 2
balding
approaching 32 years of age
single
unemployed

can i get a hell yeah?

just seen some genuine cope

i think an underrated contributing factor to the incel phenomenon is the fact that the average attractiveness of the people you see posted online is much higher than the attractiveness of people irl

they're filming scat porn lad

wish my gf were here 2bh

there's intense competition for "worst things humans ever endured" but years of trench fighting in the first world war has gotta be pretty close to the top

I'd consider British an ethnicity. I think it's probably very difficult to find a "pure" English, Welsh, Scot anymore. Maybe in the South East of England you'll have a lot of pure English, pretty much every blonde I know is from Sussex. But if you live on this island and look at your family tree you'll find a Jones, a Smith, a MacGregor, or an O'Connor in there somewhere.

Britain has a mix of many ethnicities. Just like Nigerian is probably more of a nationality than an ethnicity, because Nigeria is a mix of many ethnicities.

Some of you are really really thick like I have to sit here and explain a simple point in 10 different ways just for you dumb fucks to understand

in the pub yesterday

talking with a femoid

she called orangutan monkeys

corrected her and said they were actually apes

could feel the vibe shift into one of discomfort

normies are only comfortable around other retards
attempt to inject some facts into the equation and they go mental
unsurprisingly I went home alone

Must have been absolutely dire, soul breaking stuff. And then one day some tarq decides he'd like you to be mown down by a German machine gun for no reason.

She probably thought nothing of it

you probably said it in a really bizarre incellish way didn’t you

I would've told her she's pretty and had sex

The thing with WW1 is that we probably could have just let the Navy strangle Germany. It may have taken a few years more, but ultimately they only surrendered because our blockade had them on the brink of famine.

"They're fucking apes man! *slams pint across the table* Fucking little spacker..."

just not something you correct irl to a woman you're trying to pull though is it

apes are a type of monkey

it hard for the tarqs too you odious worm

Overheard some lad say 'Actually, orangutangs are apes not monkeys' to some bird in the pub yesterday and you could see her pussy seize up dry. Shame as she looked into him before that.

good lad. i really cant stand cunts who cant tell us apart

no they aren't you cunt
they have tails for fuck's sake

No-one likes a smart-arse. That's why autists do poorly when dating and trying to make friends, because they just can't help themselves from going "um acktually" about shit that doesn't matter in the slightest. You made her feel like a fool and you made yourself look like a dickhead. I hope you learn from this.

saw an organge ape just pure raping a woman outside of wetherspons yesterday as she walked home alone and disgruntled

she would have went to the traphouse anyway
dont worry

my tail is in front

there's a lot more to why autists do poorly when dating than that mate

You dont think french knights drowning in mud and shit at agincourt as smelly peasants come up and stick a knife in them was pretty bad?
Naval warfare was pretty grim too

what words should one specifically use to ask a woman out unironically.

hey you wanna go out sometime?

feels low effort, but everything else feels cringe and reddit

you're lying, you weren't there at all

get your thighs out for us

im a council estate runt with grandparents from ireland therefore everyone is like that

No

might let pain harden my heart in a minute

that was an orangutan

I luv it

I was talking to a woman and her friend in the garden of a pub yesterday and it was all going well and then I said 'alright goodbye then' and walked away.
This happened twice that evening. And every time I talk to a woman.
Don't like embarrassing myself you see.

Love how "roadman" culture has spread to the point kids in the Scottish seaside are fucking carrying knives and stabbing each other.

Seriously what has happened.

Kids are either basically petty criminals or fat little blobs holed up in their rooms playing Minecraft and listening to Andrew Tate because they're 15 and can't get a bird.

Bring back fingering I say.

Orang means man in Indonesian/malay

XD

read it 3 times and dont understand

apes are catarrhines therefore are considered old world monkeys.

germans would have taken france in that case. they even won on the eastern front in 1918 and siezed a shitload of grain-producing land, if theyd had a year to harvest they could have gone on longer. it just so happened that the western front completely collapsed just as they won in the east, which wouldnt have happened without continuous crushing pressure from britain and france (and america)

ever had sex lad? thought not

Ban andrew tate but dont yiu dare ban a music genre centred around violence misogyny crime and consumerism... its just their culture

Nice..

If you look at your Great Grandparents surnames I guarantee you that you'll find at least one which is non-english.

i accept your concession

i'd rather not

in world war one, if you fell off the wooden boards you were walking on and fell in the mud the other soldiers would just leave you because they'd die if they tried to help
so you’d die either from drowning in mud, or being trampled to death

I WAS TALKING TO A WOMAN AND HER FRIEND IN THE GARDEN OF A PUB YESTERDAY, AND IT WAS ALL GOING WELL. THEN I SAID "ALRIGHT, GOODBYE THEN" AND WALKED AWAY.
THIS HAPPENS EVERY TIME I TALK TO A WOMAN.
I DON'T LIKE TO EMBARRASS MYSELF.

Britannia

white kid:

*stabs another white kid*

rorke:

”hmm how can I blame nonwhites and my own lack of sex for this”

nope. called Sighbert Wulfingar just like my father and his father before him and so on

you're a slut though
our slut

my great grandfather got taken captive by the turks at gallipoli. he apparently kept a diary during all of it. would have been a fascinating read, but one of the council-estate mongs I unfortunately share a family tree with inherited it when he died and it's been missing ever since.

sir

??
ive recovered

Brexit reset deal predicted to boost UK economy ‘by £25 billion per year’
As Keir Starmer prepares to announce his third international trade agreement of the month, the Brexit reset deal looks like a gamechanger.

*rolls eyes* whatever..

you have 14 kids of course

I saw a 14 year old with a balaclava in Sainsburys with his mum the other day. lmao, I blame absent parents for all this

My great grandfather got taken captive by turks at gallipoli and told them that orangutans are actually apes not monkeys in the pub garden they were keeping him captive in and then he just walked away

still funny

likely a family cover story since it most likely detailed rape at the hands of hairy turkish jailor as was the norm for british prisoners of war taken by the ottomans.

you know what. I believe you

with his mum

I blame absent parents

Been impressed with Starmer lately. It feels nice to have a government which actually seems to be working towards something other than the last 15 years of embezzlement, lies, and negligence from the Tories.

Oight, mate.

Starmer doing a deal with the EU so we can use their passport gates

Genuinely fucking BASED.

israel and palestine. whatever happened there

We accept your concession

um

phwoar, wonder if that's why I'm fond of a finger in the prostate, bet it's in my DNA

he's very nice

yes

two girls pooing together on the floor with not much toilet paper there i just find this so confusing i've been thinking about the events that led to this moment

the misfits hitler episode would have been exactly what britain would have been like if the nazis had won.

you are the fans

the last 15 years of embezzlement, lies, and negligence from the Tories

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It feels nice to have a government which actually seems to be working towards something other than the last 15 years of embezzlement, lies, and negligence from the Tories.

And then you woke up?

If its after season 2 i didnt watch

demonic creature

My great grandfather got taken captive by turks at gallipoli and they showed him two girls pooing together on the floor with not much toilet paper there and told them that orangutans are actually apes not monkeys in the pub garden they were keeping him captive in and then he just walked away

I was talking to a woman and her friend and they both seemed to like me but that made me nervous that if I carried on talking to them they would realise that I am actually a very unlikeable and boring person so I said "Alright, goodbye then" and walked away.

its just poo porn mate not exactly a study in scarlet

fuck off

which one of them suggested it to the other? what was going through her mind when she did? why did the other one agree? the female mind is mysterious beyond words

Yeah the deal where more indians can come over while paying no N.I is great mate

scr

die

it's in series 3
the show was shit after nathan left i agree

alright, goodbye then

SHITPUFFIN

You too.

It's a low bar, but they're indisputably doing a better job than the Conservatives.

how do you approach a woman if you are on your own and the woman is with a friend. surely it would be awkward to just latch on to them for the rest of the night.

do niggas really not cheat on their wives with prostitutes every once in a while

ladies, you are looking good tonight!

make it Scotland XD

initiate conversation on the topic of apes and monkeys, start with orangutans

They’re been disaster clown boy

fuck offf

good ice breaker is to ask them to sit on the floor and poo together

theres a new dollhouse character in the works lads. yet to give him a name, but he's the schizo leftymong on here, hes got a very effeminate prose and uses these reddity swear words like cunt and twat a lot, he's from camden because he always bangs on about camden, and i'm pretty sure he's an indian

It is quite alarming how much employers employ women now rather than men. They're seen as a safer bet.

XD

hello you two pretty ladies

daddy wouldn't let me have children
he wanted me to do this instead

haha timmy's wife

talk to them as though you've been having threesomes for 6 months

I once seduced a group of 5 when I dragged in a box of old speckled hen and commenced steamingtoil with them.

I was talking to a woman and her friend about the The C Programming Language in the pub garden when I realised that women don't like men who talk about the The C Programming Language so I diverted the conversation to the differences between Apes and Oragutans but I couldn't stop imagining her and her friend pooing together on the floor with not much toilet paper there and said "Alright, goodbye then" and just walked away.

I knew one of the women from beforehand

I was late master

jew daycare

kek stealing that one

say "looking good tonight ladies" then just walk away

rorke you utter cockwombling spunktrumpet

That's it.

ktim

wasn't talking to you

*dissolves into dust*

feeling a bit sad and lonely

What?

cranking my hog

grown balding man farting under the covers in his childhood bedroom

actually mad how much of a normie ive turned into over the last decade.

This type of reaction is really strange when Labour have been so reserved in their actions.
Labour don't want to means test bennies for the wealthiest generation in human history and have made vague promises about not letting a billion bomalians in, and that's been enough to get these freaks to turn on them. It's really disheartening to know we probably won't ever have a government with the bollocks to tackle the big problems in this country when any attempt, no matter how small, gets reactions like this

Fix the damn engine

at this hour?

but it was me who originally posted the story of talking to a woman and her friend in a pub garden which inspired who to make your post so really you were
did you know that orangutans are apes not monkeys
alright goodbye then
*walks away*

hell

Could also be a rorkepost

The tories let in millions of 70 IQ browns and can never be trusted again

:-)

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Lots of the girls I work with tend to treat it a bit like school, lots of notebooks full of annotated information, like revision guides for exams. In office jobs they tend to be more robotic employees than men who will do the job asked efficiently. Blokes tend to retain their free will and mind a bit more, and work more on instinct than process, and the powers that be don't like that.

well queer farmer's told him to suck his cock thus far
RHETORICALLY he's on point but that's worth very very little of course

mad how moo deng poo peng gay porn

There's a reason I am walking.

Very schizophrenic air to the thread recently isn't there.

It's funny really how these people can't help but inflict themselves on others

Why not go outside for the day

I feel like I've only gotten decent at socialising in my late 20s
spent a lot of my late teens and early 20s as an autist basically looking back

in the pub yesterday

talking with a femoid

she called orangutan monkeys

corrected her and said they were actually apes

could feel the vibe shift into one of discomfort

just walked away

receive text from her today saying "you seemed really cool to begin with but then you got too drunk and kept correcting my taxonomical definitions and so i dont want to see you again"

fucking hell lads what is wrong with me

grow up

I might see a woman outside and then I would have no choice but to talk to her but then it would go well and I would get nervous so I would have to walk away

Well this wasn't on my Brexit bingo card for 2025!

schizophrenic air fryer

I don't care I want to have babies

always imagined it would be awkward approaching 1 woman in a group of other women. because not only would it be extra embarrassing if she wants nothing to do with you but it also seems offensive because you want nothing to do with the rest of the group.

c'mon

ktim

watch this

Nine times out of ten what happens in this scenario is the fattest girl in the group will speak up and tell you to go away and leave her friends alone

that's why you need to go to the club in a group, especially if you aren't conventionally good looking. the cheerleader effect is just as true for men as it is women.

screaming

elf peg crab
or
calf beg rep

that's why you move on the the 2nd most attractive of the group

think I'd find it easier honestly
one on one is so intense, with a group it's a bit more loose

Asian

LG x

one more move

fucking hell this brings back a memory from when a girl told me she was good at cooking, so I asked if she could cook for me sometime. Her friend said "No, I have to protect her from you."

Going on my holidays tomorrow waheey it lush x

grow up

fastar

what does that even mean

Fish sticks are absolutely diabolical

Look man, I want to cum in her vagina

It’s no good, I need to buy another pass lads

deep cut

What?

quick run down on why the egyptian is posting

Where you going lad?

diabolically delicious

XD

is he? filtered his nonsense weeks ago

That's not exactly what she said.
It was a long time ago so it's like teardrops on a mouse's handkerchief, but she meant something along the lines of "No. You have a weird vibe. I need to protect her. Stop speaking to her."
Or at least that's how interpreted it.

primary school teacher

gymanstics coach

third world missionary work

what else can I do if I'm horny

what are you, a straight fish?

something's given me a proper acne breakout the last couple weeks and I don't know what

Make it Spain XD

and did she just obey the fat cow and stop talking to you

Fuerteventura lad

toby

The hate eating with Todd gets on his videos is insane

is it errrr minor spelling mistake and bradley walsh reactions

This is so wrong.

im like one of those biblical profits

literally who

I felt a bit insulted and walked away.

Pwoar enjoy lad, had some sun sea and sangria in Mallorca myself the other week

fuck

I will mate. Corr nice one

Are you on the edge of your seat now?

live, laugh, love

x

yhe binble

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spamming/flooding

A girl has messaged me on Tinder. What do I do?

I saw a dog

just walk away lad

say goodbye to her

ask her for her thoughts on orangutans

any good youtube channels to put on in the background while im grinding in a game

Fanny Chmelar

yeah

intense.

youtube.com

Did her great grandfather serve in Gallipoli?

Say "Alright, goodbye then" and walk away.
You can only embarrass yourself otherwise.
Right now she likes you.

picture of your cock never fails

crabs

yeah?
mcafee sternly warning me not to click this

What about Koch?

Do you think her and her friend poo on the floor of a photography studio with not very much toilet paper on the floor?

anhedonia'd out me arse

Toby Hero X

scranhedonic

sweat

Just sat on an Easter egg

um poster outside my window going UM UM UM

cats does countdown
sean lock: joe Wilkinson, danny dyer
the other guy: fat loud bitch, fat gangsta black guy

kahteem

spoiler: sean locke dies in the end

didnt used to like asian women but my mates got a chinese gf and corrrr corrrrrr phwoar CORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRERRRRRRRRRRRRRR fucking CORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Fine.

Sven GORAN Ericsson

bugs are disgusting

throwing rorke off the dartford crossing this evening

Just shat out an Easter egg

Nigger

Not in the flipping mood for this shite

current experiencing something akin to post-holiday blues

Why are they not taking me seriously lad??

BBC light entertainment presenter

serotonin levels are fucked maite

wat

why do british geezers say 'get in' with a balled fist when that are pleased with an outcome

yh but shes proper fit and has a tight little round bum on her, nice tits too
when she smiles i almost get a stiffy

performed a fall asleep before the delivery paki could get my scran to me last night

lurk more

Always tough mate but we all get through it

post a pic from her insta lad

like clockwork the depressive drug addict atheists are sadposting again lmfao

why are you a gaylord?

Anjuna Sunrise.

refers to a ball being kicked into the net - a score, as it were

man with ball innit

Dogberg

remembering when they kicked me out of school and I got to go to a school for people who had been kicked out of school

Did you know?

get in

stayyyyy away from the summoner!
stay-st-st-staaaayyy away from the summoner!

god's made up, diego
sooner you accept it the happier you'll be

Get in lad, fookin' get in

Just spent 30 quid on Temu and got fucking LOADS of stuff, honestly quite mental

Is there a school for people who have been kicked out of school for being kicked out of school

Seems legit.

I read it’s from war and battles, they’d shout get in as in get in the fight to the men when victory was close

shadowboxing the deigo dollhouse character in your head again lmfao

You realise this "argument" doesn't prove the existence of God, right?

Got my lightly shat pants on

what did you get????? loads of plastic???????

You lads ever play yugioh of MTG

What did you get?

I didn't want to see Celtic.

No, they just send you to a different one.
If it is far away the council pays for your taxi every day.

schools for pregnant and nursing teens

up me apples and pears for two bob a shilling and bobs your uncle

A box full of SARS hopefully

Why would anyone waste their time trying to prove anything to a drug addict loser?

deigo

You are the filth.

Dobergé et Cabergé

Anyone ever bought used knickers?

Mom.

Beg your pardon

currently eating an easter egg

What's that ship??

knotted

fat clown

poo

but we are in your garden

new thread please

I will end you.

This also doesn't prove anything

You've been exposed

its because i hadn't ate it from easter

Watched the TV show a couple of times, as far as I can tell it was about a preeteen baritone who goes around shouting at randos about ancient egyptian shit while numbers appear on the screen

Back

Let's see.