/brit/
/brit/
poo smells lmao
I have to leave for work now. For my 4AM shift, you understand.
dead for over an hour but somehow survived and made a full recovery
crikey. how is that even possible.
E "nofap" é ciência desde quando?
he was dead but he got better
Incomprehensibly grim
cannae wait till janny come home
no fap is pseudoscience, it can be helpful as an exercise in discipline and your testosterone does go up only a bit for the first few days but it levels out
feel bad because there was at least one good person posting on /brit/ but then I had to go and eat my sandwich
never seen Alien (1979)
never seen Jaws
never seen ET
never seen Jurrasic Park
never seen any Indiana Jones
never seen any Pirates of the Caribbean
never seen any Star Wars
I simply do not give a shit
seen every other big film though
I want to move to your beautiful country
I want to be surrounded by English people
I want to go out and hear all your wonderful accents
I want to experience English culture, the good and the bad, in all its glory
I want to wake up every morning with a mission to learning something new about your country and its history
jurassic park is the only one worth watching if you didnt see the rest as a kid
*farts profusely to get your tongue out of my arse*
will swap
google says they kept shocking his heart and it didn't start beating again on its own for 78 minutes
Have you been?
didnt ask
you have to stop posting the frog cartoons before you can do this
you literally did though
Making a bone flute
unironically desirable
Yes, twice. First time was just to London and some of the surrounding areas. Second time I explored more of the north of England and lower Scotland. Wish I'd had the time to go down to Cornwall, that place seems cool.
It's such a wonderful experience to be able to go to a foreign land with familiar yet strange customs and actually be able to interact with the locals in the language you're fluent in. I've been to Spain as well, and although I learned a bit of Spanish in high school it's just not the same when you can't freely express yourself and say whatever you want.
fockin
dont think i did actually mister
I love him
am cheekylad
a will do what a want x
fun fact:
British Empire was never superpower
in england you can say whatever you want
thats not fun at all
freely express yourself and say whatever you want
categorically untrue
ugly girl
thank God this would NEVER happen in America!!
*jumps up to the ceiling of the thread and refuses to come down*
porn addiction rotted your brain and now you think ugly girls are hot
happy sinko del majo x
this man just say it is
ahoy matey *fires the poo cannon*
E onde foi que eu disse que ela é bonita? Anonzinho... não é meu cérebro que está com problemas...
AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOGA
start doing this
<---------------
i exclusively shit in the shower
idk bro when i read all these posts with americans saying how much they love our culture it weirds me out. nothing about this country is worth admiring.
our own leader said being british is about loving scones and driving a range rover. dead country held up by a first world city that has been taken over by third worldies.
epic trvth nvke
it was good once
IT LOOMS
so was egypt and iran
i'll keep using this
for me, its a rain shower
i love brasil girls
very bonita
for me, it's half a spoon of the spittle of a red and blue cockerel
folk remedy for balding is it?
love showers like this me
think I'm over sex lads simply had too much of it
you have the same blood as newton, darwin, byron
what happened?
Sexy bonita Brasilians Oh oh oh sim, querida, assim mesmo, estou quase lá, oh oh oh
was a great decision to get one installed in my shower
Kaaa ka ka ka ka ka ka ka ka ka kaaa~
he had to wear braces
HAHAHAHAHHA YOU GENETIC FAILURE HAHAHAHHAHA WHATS WRONG LIL GUY?? JAW TOO NARROW TO GET NORMAL TEETH??? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA INCEL
ww1 and ww2 ruined us
no, this one is a detumescing cure for far too bulky male tubing
Fructicious Chuva de chuva linda e sexy, mano, ooh sim, baby, estou quase lá la la
well, you should stop listening to your "leaders" anyway
need a sexo gf
Shit just hit the fan
All fubar
I’ll keep you posted
should be pooing in the toilet really mate
fructicious sexo mano eu quero fazer sexo com aquele baby
an indian-american physician from Mississippi is still richer than british viscounts
For me, the arse shower is superior
she finally found the piss drawer?
Thanks for going to the gym with me today Anon! I'm a hormonal mess because I'm going through menopause.
WYD?
thats a man
wonder what mousey is up to these days
turn 370 degrees and walk away
Mating Press
post her best scene(s)
shit makeup is really hard to get off
>I really appreciate you inviting me out for dinner tonight anon! I've been feeling down ever since my husband went on a business trip to Thailand with his colleagues for 6 months.
WYD?
Don Draper does not approve
shes very ugly now
imagine getting turned on by grannies
At mates house
Take a sneak peak inside his mums room
See this
"Anon, I didnt see you there.... you know I've been lonely ever since my husband died. My son hasnt that been nice to me since he passed.... I've been looking for a big strong man to take care of me"
She lets loose the gown tie, revealing her perfectly sculpted 40 year old thick mummy body.
WYD?
*imagines it*
ok now what
yeh alright mate give us time to contemplate your other posts
keek
Can go pretty old. Think maybe mid 60s. I've exaggerated this ability of mine in my personal life and it's had devastating consequences.
imagine getting turned on by grannies
very low t male vibes
do you like this?
Baby Making Sex
u get 48 hrs w her. wyd ?
och a just cannae accept that mousae left us and got himself a bird
lick her feet and pits, drink her piss, and eat her hot steamy logs
Why has this thread turned into a gooner ERP general?
state of this loon
Thanks for taking me to the nutritionist today, Anon! I'm a hormonal mess because I'm going through menopause.
WYD?
nothing
I don't shag coal burners
same. but i make an exception for your mum
According to Forbes, as of 28 April 2025, Thiel's estimated net worth stood at US$19.1 billion, making him the 102nd-richest individual in the world
"Coal burners? What does that mean, anon? It sounds so silly. Let's have some fun on my bed."
WYD?
begone with you, vile harlot
"getting better" by the beatles but it's in minor key and call it "getting worse"
wish i were a billionaire
but you would shag a slut who has a body count of 50+ but none were black?
i shagged your mum. so yes
would you....do anything ?
Billionaires by Forbes are just nouveau riche. Old money patricians dont care about it
whatever do you mean?
my mum is married to a black Central American
not even joking
yeh? refute this then
if you come to the Chop Gate spring car boot sale two weekends from now...i will...show you...
Oi’m ‘Arry Potta innit love?
I love England because you guys have the best MILFs/GILF of them all.
disgusting
busy then im afraid. plus i dont want any cheap secondhand tat
my collie fur...is fresh
she's not even the hottest aussie cumdump, savannah bond clears
not much a woman could do that would make me not want to shag her really
if she's fit I'll fuck her simple as
go over to mate’s place to play some CoD
he runs to shops to get snacks
bored, wander around house
hear humming from upstairs
it’s his mum, door half open
she’s doing yoga in the living room wearing tight leggings and a tank top
turn to leave
“Oh hey anon... didn’t mean to tease you. I just get so *tense* without a man around the house…”
she stretches deeper, glances back at me
“Maybe you could help... relieve some stress?”
WYD?
might put all my money on red
Are they sweet?
at mate’s house, he's out grabbing energy drinks
wandering the halls, bored
notice his mum’s bedroom door slightly open
curiosity.exe
peek inside
she’s lying on the bed in silky red lingerie, scrolling on her phone
she looks up, slow smile
“Anon… didn’t expect *you* to come in… but I’m glad you did.”
she sits up, lace clinging to curves that defy her age
“It gets *so* lonely here sometimes… especially with no one to tuck me in.”
she pats the bed beside her, eyes locked on mine
“Close the door, won’t you?”
WYD?
not really. a tiny bit maybe. a little salty too.
there are multiple varieties with chocolate on top
wtf is up with all the coomer posting
I'll tell you what I'm NOT doing mate and it's reading a word of that
cut her up like i did that boy
chilling at mate’s place, he's in the shower
get thirsty, head to the kitchen
his mum’s there in a silk robe, sipping wine
robe clings to her like a second skin, little too much leg showing
“Didn’t hear you come in, anon…”
she leans on the counter, cleavage basically waving at me
“You’ve grown up so much… I remember when you were just a shy little thing.”
she steps closer, fingers trailing the rim of her glass
“You know, I’ve always had a soft spot for strong, quiet boys. Want a sip? Or something stronger?”
WYD?
alri albert fish
raping my arse with a candle stick
mate’s at work, said i could hang at his place
his mum answers the door in a towel, fresh out the shower
steam still clinging to her skin
“Oh… you’re early, anon.”
she smirks, towel drops *just* enough
“You gonna stand there, or help me dry off?”
WYD?
Impregnation
Your mate is gonna be out of the shower in a little bit. it's not like you and her are alone
nononononono no no no
she leans in, whisper-hot breath on my ear
“Then we’d better not waste time, hmm?”
grabs my hand, leads me toward her room
door clicks shut behind us
“Be quiet,” she grins, “unless you *want* him to hear.”
heart pounding louder than the bathroom fan
shower still running... but for how long?
WYD now?
let's ask janny what he thinks
cum n shid in my pants
COLONEL MUSTARD
IN THE LIBRARY
WITH THE CANDLESTICK
janny kicks down the door mid-stroke
“NO FUN ALLOWED”
bans me for 3 days
his mum winks at me on the way out
worth it
would commit wholesale slaughter in order to suck hitomi's tits
heater's not coming on again so I gave it a stern talking to
listening to Pet Shop Boys
I take seven kids from Columbine, stand 'em all in line
Add an AK-47, a revolver, a nine
A MAC-11 and it oughta solve the problem of mine
And that's a whole school of bullies shot up all at one time
MY THROT IS DRY
oooh west end girlsss
throt
whats that?
;-)
yes that is one of their tunes
I used to get punked and bullied on my block 'til I cut a kitten's head off and stuck it in this kid's mailbox
it's scary me!
please respect my privacy
want to play a game?
win “fuck a fan” contest with belle delphine
show up to the hotel nervous but hyped
she opens the door in pink cat ears and nothing else
“H-hi I brought you… uh… my… my bathwater collection… I mean—wait no”
trip over my own feet, knock over her ring light
faceplant into her chest
start crying for no reason
“sorry i’ve never touched a girl before”
she giggles, pats my head like I’m a lost chihuahua
“You’re cute when you malfunction.”
WYD?
the competency crisis is coming hard and fast
Why am I watching you do this?
good
throt is like frot but when you rub your necks together
cut her up like i did that boy
win “fuck a fan” contest
I am not a fan of this woman and would never enter such a contest.
I will tell for the last fatherfucking time
you are a fan of this woman and you would enter the contest.
you won!
Imagining a scenario in which Emma Watson farts in a casual manner during a conversation and acts as if nothing happened.
My husband is dead and I need sex now
WYD?
Cheers
well that gimmick set the record for fastest filter addition
where are they?
how can you filter the gooner posters?
She's clearly lonely after such an event and I would not exploit her for sex even if it's what she thinks she needs.
The cat did not deserve it anon
Too young
Yes
Bet
Now I’m imagining a scenario where Emma Watson has the same gross tendencies as Amber Heard, defecating in strange places.
Too young
she is in her mid 20s
range banned again
Too young
she's 25, lad
we're at work mate give it a few hours
a smile might be good
quit loligagging
Hm
howling
morning lads
If they aren't old enough to either my mom or grandmother then No.
you need the filename dumpass
righto cobba. see you then
typed out a sinister and evil post...too foul to post here...
afternoon fella
you're mentally ill
Good
what are you going to goon to today?
some men are just destined to rvle....
i dont need shit you melt
Send some sexy ladies
what's with the egyptian flag bot
belle delphine used to be cute but now she's old and busted
not him but gay fart porn
Subtle
Waking up on my day off. Time to play with my cock all day!
watching videos from the british museum
belle wannabe
There was that spot
your pineal gland screaming out as it shrivels and calcifies from all the cooming
you live a miserable life but pretend to be having a great life on Anon Babble
Anon Babble’s bot detection system must have taken a hit after the hack.
she's got better tits but yeah it's weird an e-thot phenotype has emerged
Let's be realistic, dude.
"You are mentally ill for being straight"
Ok, i can live with that illness.
hope it's ready for the utter punishment i'm going to give it today
i'm having a great time thank you very much
Time to play with my cock all day!
Was so good to be stolen from me
based post more mummies
Twei ein drei
new toilberg starts tomorrow
nervous
Take the ein
who wants smoothies?
Five oclock! Time to shit out of my own fuck
i hope he does this to you
Ancient Egypt
didnt happen
when does /brit/ decide to cum while in the middle of an intense goon sesh?
gayncient peegypt
DO YOU WANT A SMOOTHIE OR NOT
Grow up
Mongolian MILFs are something
quack
oi leave my bf alone
amazing face and breasts. she really rocks that makeup.
smoothies
geese do not quack, they honk
they quack in this country
ohhhh... I hate mongorian
kia ora
ni hao
you're wrong
how do we solve the birth rate crisis in the uk?
youre wrong and youre a grotesquely ugly freak
I dunno
get rid of feminism
its that simple
rhymes with cape
deal with the incel problem once and for all
what would that do?
incel vibes
you're entering dangerous territory
XD
thanks
what would that do?
feminism causes women to choose university and careers over having children
By watching "Adolescence"
Are you an idiot?
me on the right
Looks like my hand
the lads in this photo were children btw
feminism is the right of women to choose what they wish
many women would choose to be mother's rather than have a career if it were possible to survive on the man's income alone
but it largely isn't possible in this era
dw i newydd fastwrbio
everyone was
I did not put an apostrophe in mothers
blame the bastard autocorrect
obamna
What?
Lads?
Why should he?
WHY CAN’T PEOPLE HAVE FUN
Open up the bottles
I’ll honk up your fucking arsehole mate
don't you wish
You owned me