/brit/

LOVELY FUCKING CANS edish
FUCKING LOVELY CANS sub-edish

been posting here 30 years

eating a pice of lemon down in paradice city

on the cans and scrans

brit more like fart

Based

cans cans wonderful can there's nothing quite like it for scranning your scrans

IS THIS THE ONE THING THAT GOT ME TRIPPING
IS THIS THE ONE THING THAT GOT ME SLIPPING

tupa-tupa-tupa

You’ve been told boys

youtube.com/watch?v=5jpkxyaA_YI

tore him a new one

I think it's more like he's an incel, lad.
And is struggling with the fact that he's doing things 'properly' but due to his personality being utter shite, like a bad pint, he reverts to this format to try to project to others that he's above them in terms of looks on the scale of 'fuckable' to 'unfuckable' in the eyes of women

no way that's real

getting bummed

chat is this real

doesn't sound like you're laughing
sounds more like you're single and seeing baldies in relationship gets you mad

I remember this guy put his cock in a pig's head (allegedly)

doesn't sound like you're laughing

exactly, my look is telling you something when nothing I can do can convince you that I'm laughing.

Keep on coping brother.

Toil is giving me my own office finally after I suggested it for privacy
So the good news is: I can watch shite at the toil and people are less likely to fucking do drive bys
The bad news is that it's far from the massive chebs toil girl

nth for the baddiedem

God the lower middle/working class is repulsive.

so did your dad (the pig's head being your mum's)

cringe post

can't stop watching blasphemy porn
shagging on top of bibles, putting crucifixes in various orifices, pissing in holy water
I didn't even have a traumatically religious upbringing, why do I like this shit
feels bad man

but due to his personality being utter shite,

jeremy meeks was a in a gang, was dealing drugs and beat a teenager to almost death. women campaigned for him to get released early from prison and he became a multimillionaire.

did this good personality save him or his looks?

keep on coping.

lighten up

Thanks for winning the argument for me, lad.
The other lad will still take the bait from you, I'm sure.

Doing a nun up the bum

Shall be discretely handing this card to a few lucky ladies

no problem, glad i could school you.

i'd tell you to seek god but you'd probably want him to shove a dildo up your arse

blud calls his right hand a nun

that'll be your face on judgement day young man if you don't repent

You can't uncope a coper.

Why they include a dirty hippie in the Muppet Show?

big night of shagging planned mate?

God gets the last laugh in the end.

no, i'm laughing at copers.

Think I'll finally play the last of us.

I won't watch the tv show

the actress is very very ugly

not even maisie ugly hot

just awfully awfully weird looking and ugly

haha alright mate enjoy x

Skyprop

actress

they're non-binary akshually (and autistic)

they tend to squeak around this time of day

Lads
I've got a FIRST date with a girl at half 8 and the restaurant says "BYOB: Bring your own Booze"
I don't drink - does this mean I need to bring booze in order to get in or is the booze optional?

blasphemy porn

my favourite pornslut did this recently, I felt like shit watching and spaffing to it. post nut clarity had me down for a while. something in your spirit is telling you it's wrong lad, heed it' warning

It's run by muslims and they dont want to touch it.

damn my haircut looking sexy af

those turks did me good my boii

made some absolutely cracking posts over the years that got zero (You)s

desuarchive.org/int/search/filename/the wife/country/ie/

It means bring your own booze

muslims drink

Fuck it I feel too tired to go out tonight, just gonna hang with the /brit/ boys till I watch a film and fall asleep

I’d bake Emma Watson’s poo into a pie.

This is the face of copers when they realise all that good will and "personality" doesn't save them at the age of 48 when they get divorced, half of his assets taken away and his children's custody removed.
They'll just move onto another cope.

Oh good you're here because I have a suggestion for you, you should use that scene from Soulja Boy's Crank That with the black Superman as a reaction image.

what kind of shit restaurant doesn't serve alcohol

I felt like shit watching and spaffing to it

You should do. You've earned yourself at least a few decades spent in penance in purgatory.

No, you can get in without any
But maybe ask the girl (if you're not on a date with a girl then please castrate yourself, lad) if she has a preference to what she'd like as you don't drink

Fucking kek
thanks for that, lad

she is going to hell

If you want to drink alcohol you should bring it with you but beware there could be a corkage fee

not out in the open

going to watch the sweeney me

you don't drink at all?

why not just post it

mad how good the drumming is on don't you (forget about me)

Beers of the kingdom

talk more about sucking breastmilk of your wife

our prisons aren't full of them because of systemic islamophobia
tons of them are degenerate pieces of shit

Let me know if it’s any good. Undecided what I’ll watch

desuarchive.org/int/search/text/it pie night/

HEY
HEY
HEY
HEEEEEEEY

bro thinks this is chatgpt

Manchester Piccadilly is a grim station. Birmingham New Street hard mogs it

you dont get put into prison for drinking alcohol in this country achmed.

it wasn't on the first page of google so I gave up but still I think it would be right up your alley

ngl I'm naked right now

it's not even that hot but I'm naked

shut the fuck up

'dines on toast down the hatch

I've already punished myself enough. I ruined a good JAV wank to hoping onto to that blasphemous shite

I know

not what i said, mahmoud

bet its grim when you pull your kegs down

of course it's good, it's john thaw and dennis waterman

our prisons aren't full of them because of systemic islamophobia

tons of them are degenerate pieces of shit

copers look at this and think this is the best they'll ever get

Speaking of different cultures, lads
Why is it that for some fucking reason, Eastern European Sadhbhs seem to have massive fucking chebs?

mad how rozane gay and claudine gay are related

literally a gay nigga mafia

would you rather spend your savings renting your flat until another job comes or move back home and save your money there until the next job comes?

Literally every time I log on, no matter what time of day, Ziedbelg and DTFIC are here arguing amongst themselves and being totally ignored by everyone else

move home obviously not spending my savings on landlordberg's rent

move home i have no savings

skinny yardie goons are showering and showing off batondem live on facetime for katy

copers can do better than that blasphemous whore, but fuck does she kiss and swing her hips good

neither of them have lives
spainnonce and heathermong are sat in here all day too

skinny birds don't do it for me

bender

grim

where is everyone

the more you pray for others, snowball effect

snowballs melt

mental how I have no mates and I'm wasting my youth

QRD on how to order a pint at the pub/tavern properly

truthnuke

Miss placed my phone charger. Hope it’s in my car. Will have to head out shortly to check.

been there and done that

God will repay those years lost

ask for cider pints if the weather is nice

already over for you lad get settled in

jesus christ rorke

couple of pints at the pub
second can at home about to be opened
had two fags
feeling grand lads it friday fuck toil

like hi!

This chart makes copers cope so hard.

and the tunes?

give them a short, sharp shock, dig it?

find it mental how gays are so against feet stuff
I get instablocked by any femboy who I ask for feet pics from

braincell killer juice and cancer sticks

welcome home double digit IQ mong

good lad

would really like to know what these canslands look like
seen a few yung uns at the off license buying cans in joggers and a hodie
reckon you're like that

The beautiful hapa wife

It’s ok lad soon you will be in your 30 with no mates and your youth gone.

timmy's crush

nationwide adolescence hubs powered by AI and free at the point of use
mandatory viewing in schools
DVDs of adolescence sent to every home and inside is a sticker that reads "I've seen it", but it's not a sticker, it's a facemask

Ironically going to go out in trackies and a hoodie to get the cans chips in a bit, lad

you seen her facialabuse video?

it's time to move on rorke

“Hello barkeep/ tavern proprietor”
“I should like very much for one pint of your finest ale”
“Cheers”

bit of depeche mode tonight

black people

based lad enjoy it im on the third can of lager myself

me on the left

yes

did you cum?

White Men are treated like terrorists simply for being White

I go out on Friday night and I come home on Saturday morning

feet up and relaaax

grim

used to think that black mirror episode with some retard blue dog that takes over the country was the shittest one but it's turned out to be most realistic

i didnt masturbate to it, just watched the show

youtube.com/watch?v=QxE2sRn1Vm8

If you're sober: know what the fuck you want. guinness gest ordered first if there's more than one drink

Otherwise, if drunk and doing more than 3-4 drinks: make a list on your phone and just show it to the bar staff

And lad, I swear to fuck, if you go to the bar staff with 'ummm what do you want' as you turn to your friend, I will throw a fucking can at you, lad.

just watched the show

Who's this lovely flower?

the rizz

very nice enjoy

she's dead now

least deviant female

How's it evening x

Hi there how are you

what site is that?

what is your default opening message for birds on dating apps?

good lads

virgin freak

woman saying mate

hi how are you
can i know?

might pop down to teaco for some treats

Stop swearing right now

Ah, the spaino method of seduction

'alri luv, fancy a few bevvies and a shag? I'm buying the bevvies'

thought it was grindr

i dont say anything they come to me

why didn't she block him?

can i know?

Do you have any more of these?

Can I know

And the very latest from Mumsnet?

i think it's tagged or hi5 or some other runtish little app that got btfo by tinder

must be a reason why im king of my castle

Shy, demure geisha girls slowly peeling back their panties

I have literally never watched anything on BBC4
What even goes on over there

peng weather

peng birds outside

slagposting

can't take it in my smelly bedroom any more lads
need to get back in the gym, get Anon Babble, and go shag some slags or I'm going to go doopin' mental

teaco

chatting to user girlWhoBreaksAllTheRules on Grindr

popping down the teaco

Toil idea: approach the new Sadhbh at the toil and ask her 'hi there, how are you? May I know' while staring at her massive chebs

whenever i see a modest, prudish, do-goody woman with kids i imagine what it was like for her getting rammed for the purposes of having children

Can we have sexy women in videogames again?

sorry lad it's too late to start. Maybe next year yeah?

ukadultwork

I'm not starting new mate I've got God's gift to man (muscle memory) to aid me
Shall be ottermode by midsummer

your first mistake was going on Anon Babble

anyone here suck breasmilk of there gf

sucking off a fag

It never even began for me tbqh

Mental seeing young people go through the same phases I went to. Want to help them get out of them fast but they need to make their own mistakes.

and hebes too

got a fag in my mouth right now

which phases were they?

my life has just been one phase and that's being an autistic freak

Where can I buy fags online?

smoke-king

fags.com

I FEAR THAT I AM ORDINARY
JUST LIKE EVERYONE

I was too socially retarded until about the end uni. I technically shagged two girls but I had absolutely no idea what I was doing then.

every generation thinks this.
every generation tries to help the younger generation out
the younger generation fights back.

it's just how it is.
tell a zoomer girl she shouldn't sleep around because it will cause issues for you later down the road and she will sleep with every boy out of spite.

lovely fags

smelly ugly freaks fuck too you know

based father ted poster

Friday night. Why are you here?

In my smelly room.

dem yutes is exercising dey quick twitch muscles

Mum who killed baby in 1998 gets suspended sentence

refuse to get mad about this like the redditors are

yeah

no chance

omg he isnt paying out the arse for extortianate beers

I'm very handsome and I smell nice
I'm just Auschwitz mode and simply can't muster any courage without having a muscular suit of armour

what are your plans this evening?

redditors are not mad, they support her.

bane?

old.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/1jr8tia/mum_who_killed_baby_in_1998_gets_suspended/

i love how being outside is the end all and be all of everything.
the only times i enjoyed being on a night out was with friends.

you don't need courage just chill out man anyway there'll be other sunny fridays enjoy a night on the chon

ktim except I shagged about 8 girls because I hyperfocused on looksmaxxing and learning how to talk to women

Didn't focus on my interpersonal skills at all because I wasn't even self-aware of my autism, so I was still an autistic freak the whole time I just knew how to put up a convincing mask of a normie shagger when on a date

have you seen all the downvoted and deleted comments mate?
try again.

based

any prolapsed urethra man in?

nightmare blunt rotation

had this with some twitter bot/scammer who wanted me to commission some shit art

sorry i dunno how reddit works i'm just reading the top ones

I have no friends and I have no conceivable way of making any outside of becoming a Christian which wouldn't be something I genuinely want to do for the sake of it

far too many indians really

just been outside wiejme ie ti the bhinbel

Alexa, load up the Indians getting hit by trains compilation for me please

remember when elong was le zany blunt man

nigga if you're going to treat religion like a social club, just join an actual club then you can be sinful at the same time

india is a bioweapon and ethnic protectionism is going to happen, it will scare the hoes at first but it will happen

yeah but christians believe in the whole everyone can be forgiven whereas normies are repelled by my evil incel freak presence

went down to the beach and saw Kiki

del GATO

trip to the beach :)

heaven is a halfpipe

start giving myself little tasks do do throughout the day

reward at the end is to lay down in front of the tele and mong out guilt free

the mong out bit is now becoming instantly boring

not sure if this is a good thing or not

i boil eggs in my kettle

fight me

me and the lads

the so-called lads

costs more if you have access to gas

just watch films mate
currently working through kurosawa's work myself x

i don't

i have an electric stove

picking bits and pieces out my nose
then putting them in my mouth
been doing this for nigh on 25 years

any good movies out recently?

i think the aura you give off depends what you believe about yourself, not what you outwardly present yourself as

i need a bird immediately
losing my nut without regular shags

I guess but I'm genuinely awful in social interactions, I draw blanks constantly and just kind of awkwardly be silent instead of anything because I can never think of what to say

no good arcades anymore
because of woke

corpse

imagine being brown
what a shit life that must be

gay bussy boys x

did u know zimbabwe has the highest traffic-related death rate
but i bet india is the worst for non-lethal collisions because their roads are batshit

little white boy getting replaced by us LMAO

the fish and 'za with a free lemon slice has arrived

done a nasty poo and it smells like vomit

poozza

are those poo specks

local crypto scammer/self help mong that went to my school and has a following of other mongs who follow his advice on “hustling and investing” has now lost all his shit and is having a melty online about it lol

my dad always did say gambling was a mugs game

brown this

white that

why is brit full of fucking mongs?

Fucking Hell lad
You're making me want to get pizza and chips

even if there were no whites on earth being brown would still be a grim fate
you’re all hideous and short and your skin looks putrid

Secret papers reveal new details about Andrew's ties to Chinese 'spy'

Yep get that news reported late on a Friday night, that's fine

sexooo

you going to cut the fish up and put it on the 'za?

Imagine if he hangs himself in his smelly bedroom

gf eating kfc popcorn chicken

can't handle the spice

I mean genuinely wtf
how do people have spice levels of literally 0%
bet they're gasping for air if someone dares put some paprika down or summat too
ghastly mongs

why is russell brand being charged such big news literally who cares

haha he love his food

who cares

blogs about it

sigh

my sister does this too, it’s an affectation, entirely in their head
if i make pasta and put paprika in it she moans at me for making it too spicy

Is she drugged?

michelle trachtenberg is DEAD and NONE OF YOU EVEN CARE

go be a moody cunt in your own countries thread you insufferable freak

yeah that's the half naked body if a woman who looks dead

My brother's like this, he never eats anything even slightly spicy so when he does end up eating something with spice it's the hottest thing ever to him

first time ive been in the red on my stocks and shares isa

my autistic brother really likes macaroni cheese, i tell him constantly that he should add pepper to add contrast but he just says it's "spiky" and rejects it

good for the old pound cost averaging though isn't it

wow some really big men in this thread, they can handle the medium sauce and paprika

just stop saying stupid shit

fuck it we ball

stock babies cry because a red line says their money is red when none of this will matter in 5 years when its increased tenfold.

we had action man, zoomies have this

*walks into nandos and skips the queue at the counter*

butterfly chicken to take away please mate, with extra hot sauce

*every bird in the gaff gets wet and I pick your gf and walk out with her on my arm while I scoff my spicy chicken*
later losers x

“zoomies” are 1997-2012

the children this film is marketed for is not “zoomers”

fucking mong don’t even know what you’re talking about

reality: he gets battered by four black people dying to get their chicken wings

aww, is the zoomie upset that young zoomers exist now and you get all clumped together?

Sorry I didn't specify, this happened in Stratford-upon-Avon nandos where there are no black people, or browns for that matter

you’ve been done

no one's trying to be hard they're just standard ingredients

I'd buy this if it shelfwarms and gets to $5

embellishing a poo