/brit/

don't think that's kate bush

nth for the gyaldem

people leaving secondary school this year are older than gta 5 let that sinck in

MELANIN
IN MY SOUL

wish i was a more physical person in general but i've practically got an aversion to physical contact at this point in my life

People don't change

Ten years ago I was a sensible centrist

might 'bate to kate

you're an incredibly odd man

What would improve in my life if I left Anon Babble? It's a fun place to use.

it will always be mad how he isn't holding a guitar

Bet the stupid fucking woman firefighter got stuck and the bloke firefighter was trying to save her

Any Hitlerist man in

Jannard is not going to like this early

people leaving secondary school this year were actually 4 when gta 5 came out and that is fucking mad

maybe you would have a girlfriend and be having sex rn

Don't know about you, but I use Anon Babble as a social crutch. If I didn't have Anon Babble I may have an incentive to actually go out and make friends. Maybe you're not quite as pathetic as me, though.

COCK DEEP IN A BLACK ASSHOLE

Not interested in that, I'm autistic you see.

reckon she was a witch or something, always singing about magical spells and unnatural things

time for your exposure therapy, kid
*launches a barrage of pure punches*

fair play then. post away lad

vile cunt. three people die and your first thought is to victim blame.

I'm a bisexual

i HATE the gyaldem
i wish a pox upon them
except for nora
– a haiku

And did you go out and make friends when Anon Babble was down or is that time all just a blur now

the dog did it

Are Japanese stupid?

Mad how our entire society collapsed in less than the time between GTA main series releases

no avocado on toast here

just common sense fish and chips

Fan of fascism but not hitler

Genuinely love you mad niggas lol x

haha x

No figgy dowdy

the wokerati invasion of japan is immiment

you betrayed Hitler

What the dog do?

mental and mad how I just want a bit of peace and quiet but that's too fucking much

*erases u*

He betrayed Germany. Power corrupted him

lil niggas grew up on gta5 online no wonder they're so hyped for six

this is sexist

Doesnt appear to be an Asian woman holding a light bulb

Pet Shop Boys have got a cute chinky lass doing some singing now
Not the Pet Shop Girls is it

no mate it's not, though it is an asian at least

I killed 2pac

Not many BAMEs

is it a dolphin in a bathtub

bro got lost in the sauce

love that one

blud onto nothing

got david soul on

called my dad a plonker and he got really annoyed and went "I'M NOT A FUCKING PLONKER" really loud and it set the dog off barking

xx

1,014 Asian holding light bulb photos

No thank you

/brit/ approved classic

eh? david's hole?

done that plonker

Alri Rodney Jr.

Is it an asian holding a light bulb?

that the new FromSoft game

YA BILSH

rorkes patter

For a skinny guy he packs an absolute wallop of a punch let me tell you

21st June is a Saturday
/brit/ meetup Manchester?

not trying to be crude but I just did the most incredible poo of my life
Comfortably a foot and half long
Didn't break in the toilet
Smooth as
Healthy brown
Arse wasn't at all pooey when I was wiping
A real 10/10 poo

rorke flash banging his teammates at long A

boris johnson, tussle-haired shagger

yapping dog outside my window going YAP YAP YAP

oh my god the daily mail!

My skinny friend beat my much larger friend in a fight. He got him in a headlock and he couldn't breathe.

would boris johnson make a better boris johnson than boris johnson

tonight i went on a date that just kind of made me go 'meh' and just reminisce about the ex gf and how shes perfect for me

Yes, well, firstly, if the bankers the bonuses the bankers the bonuses the bankers the bonuses it’s disgusting…and secondly, if the Tories were really serious about it they’d tax the bankers the bonuses the bankers the bonuses at 90 per cent.

I'm a Klingon.

libs status: owned

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FONT

Give the bankers bonuses to fresh off the boat migrants

set my name and profile picture as a girl on tiktok and made a funny comment on a video and 4,000 girls liked it
i am learning their ways

Matestein is taller and stockier than me and has done some MMA training but he's honestly such a fanny I reckon I could have him easy

listening to mr krabs singing irish rebel songs. mental the future we live in like.

gave the old 2001 another watch, pengers filum tbch

the world's richest man parrots our culture from 10 years ago

things are still shit

why

Um, I was assured it was over for him

Based peasant slave cheering for the slave master

Picture the guy from GTA VI having lots of melodramatic dialog. He's going to have a gay arc that he has to hide because borderline latina will kill him because she's psychotic and violent. Interesting story? Yeah, maybe, maybe. But is it GTA? NO. NOT GTA. Naughty Dog.

Imagine if there was a Indian man who was like uncle ruckus in the UK

This is basically the jist of r/uk

pretentious tosh

one good shot to the kidneys is all it takes. tall freaks beware

bluds need to link up

file.png - 1920x1080, 2.9M

kill yourself

102% african american with a 2% margin of error.

My exgfberg actually was perfect, don't know how I got her and don't know how I fucked it up. Don't really like to think about it desu. Not getting that lucky again.

fuck the shut up scousenonce

Moaning about it should help.

yeah? don't care do i

Alri. Worf, lad

*picks you up by the collar and slams you against the lockers*

im different

My life is a purgatory

stop giving him attention you fucking retards

might approach the girl I keep seeing in the library tomorrow, and give her my number
best case scenario is that we meet up for coffee
worst case scenario is that she thinks I'm a creep and doesn't text
in either case the outcome is better than not trying at all

Exgfsteinwitz is the only shag I haven't paid for, grim really

cheer up :)

*gets boner*

shouldn't have been such a naughty boy in your past life

Feelin' fine.

Ob ihr glaubt, dass meine Arbeit richtig ist, ob ihr glaubt, dass ich fleißig war.

Dass ich gearbeitet habe, dass ich für euch eingetreten bin in diesen Jahren, dass ich meine Zeit anständig Lim Dienst meines Volkes genutzt habe.

Ihr gebt jetzt eure Stimme ab: Wenn ja, dann steht für mich ein, wie ich für euch eingetreten bin.

wish you the best of luck lad genuinely
I couldn't do this

Purgatory is good, you go to heaven after purgatory I think.

good

sex is a bit of an urban legend

suicide is a sin

I'm an arsenal fan x

reek of shit and i didnt even shit myself

Based, literally nothing to lose
Just do it mate it's easy

Love watching TV shows from the 90s the vibes are so comfy

godspeed

If there are urban legends then are there rural legends and suburban legends

Purgatory

Papist nonsense made up to make money

are you meant to take their number so you can text them to start iit instead of them not texting and it being over before it began

leave it on r/teenagers next time, yeah?

yeah their called folk stories

Gay

sweet caroline (UUGH UUGH UUGH)
good times never seemed so good

texting random numbers to see if they want to be my gf, might work

why do they keep trying ot kill people on top gear
disgraceful show
should be binned

Corr *invites myself to their discord group *

*is taken aback*

ITS A SIN

bronsondance.gif - 450x242, 978.36K

Lots of valid complaints about women and dating and that but I'm not having the "I could never ask a girl out" thing, literally what's the worst that can happen, one woman out of 4 billion doesn't fancy you so fucking what

screeching

32t.webm - 640x360, 2.03M

I'm working on the assumption that if I give them my number the decision will be theirs, rather than having to awkwardly pry their number out of them

Allow Canslad to give you some advice

I want to give you my number. If you want to text me, great. If not, that's fine too.

She'll most likely be relived you're not a creep and probably text you out of relief

more like barceloner

How come we keep finishing last in Eurovision when we could send the Pet Shop Boys and get a billion points in their gay competition

The utilization of a concavity-optimized metallic or polymeric utensil, frequently referred to within domestic semiotic systems as a 'spoon', to enact the translocation of semi-solid or fluidic nutriments from receptacular origins to the oral cavity, thus serving as an intermediary techno-cultural prosthesis in alimentary rituals.

In my day it was the solar plexus. Is that still a thing?

literally what's the worst that can happen

She'll tell all her friends that "this ugly weirdo asked me out, can you believe it?". Spreads like wildfire because women gossip, reputation ruined in whatever circle you'll be in.

Seems fairer than burning for all of eternity, I'll give the Italians that. But ONLY that. Maybe spaghetti. No I like Italy what am I talking about. Or do I? Do I really?

She's literally me

gyal done up like a kipper

Really want to try Laudanum

Why would she be there by herself in the away end?

Eurovision is basically just a Nationalistic version of the X-Factor
No-one who has achieved any success would consider doing it

because we actually make music

If you give them your number they never text, women have literally no agency, you have to get their number at all costs

just go up to her and ask her what she's thinking of buying

Probably with friends. Shes a woman so shes a mindless consumer and no one is going to beat her up for being in full kit

Have had a cough for 5 weeks straight

true. they preach feminism but when it comes down to it they expect the man to do everything

I've never even flirted with a girl
it's not that I'm scared of being rejected it's just the possiblity of even chatting up a girl doesn't even register as an option to me
I don't think I'm hideous, girls used to say they fancied me when I was younger but I never pursued it, dunno maybe I'm just a bit broken perhaps from not having a dad to teach these things or something

The deliberate asymmetrical occlusion of one ocular orb via rapid palpebral constriction constitutes an archaic yet persistently utilized semiotic maneuver, employed to convey covert affiliative intent, ironic commentary, or complicit playfulness within intersubjective exchanges, often operating within subtextual registers of meaning.

got grangled didn't he

rough

risk: permament brain damage

reward: car gets to go really fast :3

I don't get adrenaline junkies
I just do not get it

Give them your email address and when they ask about numbers or socials just say you don't want to get into any trouble. Makes you sound mysterious and dangerous

Scars are distinguishing

Mogs me desu

I just do not get it

Enough about your sex life, thanks

never watched it, cheesy eurosissy slop

dont know how to talk to a girl 1on1

Through the exertion of kinetic force vectors upon the affixed lever or planar surface commonly designated as 'door', the human subject initiates the reconfiguration of the architectural boundary apparatus along a pre-established hinge axis, thereby effecting the temporary nullification of spatial segregation between contiguous volumetric domains.

once had a bird confess she'd been in love with me for 3 years and i asked her out and she kept making excuses, saying there's too much studying to do, saying we should go out with a big group of friends to test the waters first (again, we'd already been close for years) and i got so bored of it i just told i'd be picking her up at 6 that night and that worked. so averse to agency that she couldn't even say "yes" to a date after a confession of love. mental.

you're overthinking it. something like that wouldn't happen unless you were a **humongous** creep. worst case scenario - and I really do mean worst case scenario - is that she has a giggle about it in a groupchat with the girlies and then forgets about you within a week or two

do you know how much pain even a normal conversation can cause some people. it's not rational, no. but if you have actual social anxiety you'll end up associating any benign situation like this with panic and unease and self-hatred

Basically just talk to them like they are kids

Isn't it three weeks they say to go doctors to make sure you don't have lung cancer?

overthinking

i'm not overthinking ninja that literally happened to me

Changed the rules so everyone can use english which is bollocks everyone should sing in their own language

cringe everytime I look at his face

mine was a bpd loon

Wait around just after 3pm and ask her when she walks a different way from her friends

played elden ring for the first time lads

very kino game but fookin 'ell is it hard

i just say things that make me laugh and if they laugh too then i'm in but then if they dont laugh i'll just go find someone who does

12 hours of toil toil

had to 3 hours of pub toil despite hating alcohol just to be one of "the lads"

just got in

now have to do a half hour of cooking toil

WHEN WILL TOIL FUCK OFF

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give us the greentext and don't you dare leave out the bit where you were a weirdo to try and make yourself look better

I miss mousey like you wouldn't believe
Miss you rTobe

avoid the big guy on the horse

Stop being a fanny and just do it lad

Might pretend I didn't see this, might not though. Will I? Should I?

get a bloody wogslop delivered lad fucks sake

Heard getting good helps

it's the fucking delayed attacks that make it so hard. v v v fun tho

get the paki pizza in

This is all good advice. If she doesnt laugh at your jokes dont bother. A girl interested in you will laugh at anything you say, and I mean anything. You could even insult her to her face and she'll take it as a joke.

im one of those freaks who just clams up under pressure socially. like not just shit chat but just unable to think of anything at all to say. would be a disaster on a date. I'd have to turn up drunk

the one girl that I got on perfectly well with and shared my interests and humour was somali so I binned her off
shot myself in the foot there I suppose

Trick with Elden Ring is get a shield. Get a straight sword
You kinda don't ever die if you cantroll too

Remember first time fighting him for a bit and gave up
Then had a lot of cans and did it just fine

Me? I never toil. I drink booze and get deliveries. It's a good life.

On the night shift currently lads
I work shifts you see

fuck I think I've forgotten how to play cribbage

alri scranners

is lifting even worth it

fuck caberge thinking

depends if you want to pick things up

I'd have to turn up drunk

dost people mo

Move the little pegs

Your mum's been looking for you. Hop in my van, I'll take you to her :)

yeah youre a bastard who caused his own misery. shameful

dost people mo

yeah I chose confessor so I have a sword and shield. for now I'm just swinging around on my horse which seems OP but it works, I took down that boss on the bridge which slams its head on the ground

Screaming

I give off excited labrador vibes. Not the one

Women are literal spastics
You can outwit a literal spastic, can't you lads?

this is what those really rough bars in windhelm are like
argonians nicking your pints and khajiit eyeballing you

Displeased by the whole ordeal

twas brillig and dost people mo

jabberwocky

No wonder everyones massive racists to argonians if they drink peoples pints like that

that's not really a boss on the bridge its just a stronger enemy

if jeremy clankson is so obsesed with driving how come he never crashed his motor into a metal puck scything through the air in a ball of flames killing a young family

Rapey much?

theres some ugly ugly people about

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Dua Lipa 4K butthole pics

Catberg like what the actual fuck

the wokes in solitude call you racist for supporting the stormcloaks but they don't have to live with hardly any foreigners
they don't know how bad it is out here in bradf- i mean windhelm

London is a power city. We power! Wee power!
I will move all the civil service jobs back to London.
#weepower #weecity #civilservicelondon
4:14 pm, 12th of May 2025
1000000 million likes

rorke getting his taco bell on installments

when I was in Pattaya these ladyboys would come in to the bars and start feeling you up

If you want a pizza at 3 in the morning, it will be dispatched to you by an Albanian on a small motorbike.

yeah it is
i am quite interested in calisthenics, strength over oneself etc but even if you even want a decent level of strength lifting is the best way to attain it

trannies
wogs
chavs

fucking hate them all

mad how theyve got taco bell and things like that in birmingham and glasgow - all of these fuck end of nowhere places
but you never see them in london

industrious those albanians you got to give it to them

Shalom

just swalled a paki pozza down the gob

OI
bowdenposting is MY gimmick

er,
why do you have a ladies hand?

we have taco bell in london, never been looks shit

Good on him fitting deliveroo jobs into his coke graft

Me? Got £50k in the bank. Dunno what to do with it. Might have a threesome or try cocaine.

I am not Jew
I support wee city london and the civil service
it makes no sense to put the cs in darlington when all the MPs are in london, very inefficient

Drinking with girls is a one way ticket to boringville
Smoke crack with them instead, they'll never be off your dick
Real nigga tips

london is halal only i hear

I can never get the form right

Horse combat is very good, lad
Confessor is actually good
You're best off setting the flasks to do like 3:1 ratio since you can get like 3 healing spells off for one magic point flask which heals more than just one healing flask so you get more healing overall

Watched the film of Lolita. About ten minutes at a time if you catch my drift

theres no taco bell in SE

That's not going to last long is it lad? Not for me anyway

There's been Taco Bell in London for almost 40 years

They seem happy and are out having a top night. Can't be mad at that

corr giz some

radiohead lyrics are such nonsense
sounds good though

one in lewisham you mug

theyre ugly ugly people
should be kept inside away from the public
not out and prancing about

poor

there's one in newcastle, it's shit
the food is incredibly bland and tasteless, even the most spicy options, with the exception that some bits are salty as fuck
i wonder if it's like that in the sates

He doesn't wake up every day sucking lemon

christ im not going lewisham mate
too many you know whats

listen to your body, you'll be fine

send him home in a lime juice tub

what does that even mean

only thing worth getting in taco bell is the crunch wrap supreme and even that's pretty dire

the sates

i meant to write "the states" and now i've made a fool of myself in front of everyone

When ready

Thom Yorke's can write really great lyrics when he isn't disappearing up his own arse. Unfortunately since Kid A was a huge success despite having nonsense lyrics he's just sort of stopped trying for the most part, especially in recent yeasr.

where are you in SE with no you know whats?

Never get into an argument with a girl lads
Trust me

Why not, lad

You won't win

you've got good "form" if it doesn't hurt

rubbish

um