/brit/

LOVELY FUCKING CANS edish
Eastern European Chebs sub-edish

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THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND THE THINGS I SAY ON TWITTER

anakin, the meatballs are ready, use the force

streamable.com/xs7sjy

Hello 190, a message from me, Nigel Farage. Now to begin, thank you for your support, thank you for believing in me, thank you for backing Brexit. But, it has come to my attention that Rorke had you on the ropes playing FIFA and you are a wasteman, a pagan and a BHENCHOD (but I think it’s all meant very nicely).
190, good to make your acquaintance.

If it's so famous why haven't I heard of it before?

first for me

no, wait, the sauce. use the sauce anakin

I'm probably on some list

stroking my SWC (soulful white cock)

if it exists without my knowledge it exists without my consent

what are your go to spices

Mad how people go to therapy and pay people (who by the way, go to therapy and take head meds themselves) instead of turning to religion.

God doesn't want you to take sadnessazapine or freakshowazole.

God doesn't need a therapist after listening to your shit.

God doesn't care if you're black, white, brown or yellow.

God DOES care if you're a dirty poof but there's time for you to change that.

Christ is king.

adding a dash of poo to my sausage sarn for an extra kick of flavour

go on ed dutton's twitter and ask the sikh 3 tweets down haha

pre-bollocking myself for a big fat british wank

flour and thyme

good lads

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bbc ahh

Emma Bunton

yeh but if ive done all this sinning, what awaits me in heaven? despite the fact ive changed my ways, is punishment still on the cards?

I dont get it, whats their beef ?

A ginger one, lad

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Has it been officially released yet?

Billy Woods recommends it too

hate how krytencentric later red dwarf series became
his nanobots rebuild red dwarf? and resurrect the crew? what are you on about, if divadroid had access to that kind of technology, why would they bother putting it in a service mechanoid? doesn't make sense does it doug naylor?

somalians summarising summer

cooking up some awesome sauce

would love to live in france but i hate the white french i hate the brown french and i hate the black french it would be perfect if they weren't there

There is still time to give up your sinful ways, there's always time but you've got to want it

Yeah lad, its just banned everywhere. Its all over twitter

watering down the spirits in the jolly heretic public house hahahahah fuck you

Golden Earring - Radar Love
now that's a song

Feel this way about Ireland

Hmm yes I’ll listen to you you seem so godly

Got the MORE Ethiopian Soul and Groove Vol. 3 on

stubbies > cans

Rorke, it's over

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Waiting for a mate to come over we're watching the hockey game and drinking the infamous Rekorderlig 7%, feel sorry for you's that we don't export this delicious coida

The Zombies - She's Not There
now that was music

Im an outlaw, my crime?
Being a white man

was just saying this down sad bastard club

i dont mind the odd plothole here and there, its a comedy show after all
but the nanobots kryten thing is just annoying, just have them find them somewhere on a derelict planet, why does everything have to revolve around fucking kryten?

naylor probably fancied him

Mumberg keeps telling me unpleasant things about Dadstein from when I was a wee un
Use to have affairs
Cut her off from her family and friends
Threatened to murder her
Forced her to get an abortion

And the fat twats just sat in the living room full fucking volume watching Mission Impossible or some shit while browsing Facebook
I don't want to know this and then have to sit next to him at Dinner - and now she's getting pissy with me because I'm becoming colder and more distant with a man whom, by most accounts, was extremely abusive.

Just wanked to his nudes.

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frozen food tastes better if you cook it for like 10 minutes longer than it says to

you do though mate cos i've had rekorderlig a load of times here

red dwarf scene which made me realise i like men

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she wants you to rescue her and be her new lover

....name? x

He must have real good dick if she stayed. You should admire him even more.

this is extremely autistic

Very Mishima esque

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ktim

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you can't deny that chris barrie had a great body in that scene. i remember being quite surprised

anoraks usually are

*quite aroused

How long do you reckon I can hold out from paying a water bill? Money is a bit tight at the moment but shout ease up soon. So far its just polite emails but i'm behind. Should I ring them and plead poverty and menthol elf? Or just avoid it till next pay day and pay the bill.

take the oil back and bring it back hot!

yes mate it's old early internet autistry from usenet. started in 1995 i think. no one on the internet then was normal, especially the ones watching red dwarf

neighbour making some reyt noises right now. Sounds like she's shitting out a brick

She's just trying to get you on her side before the divorce, bet she made all that shit up and he was a great dad but she wants a new rich toyboy

That's probably missing at least a few hundred, lad
Including, but not limited to all the other edishes I made

you don't exist and they're unaware of you, no human being at this moment is bothered whatsoever. you can absolutely wait until next pay day and pay it then, it will all be resolved without anyone ever knowing it happened. only after it's been long enough that some guy is forced to phone you up and begin 'step one' will it ever even be a thing that possibly happened.

BLOG ON

Just stop paying it
eventually you can seethe and bitch enough to the point where they'll give you some payment plan bollocks where they want £30 a month or something else retardedly low

These ghouls make most their money overcharging middle class mongberg's direct debits

fucking hell is that kay's cooking?

always thought calling young boys "master" was strange but i assume it's some quirk of the language and master actually meant little kid or whatever back in the day

paying for water
mad

No she's an idiot. She's definitely upset that he's treating his dad different and it's making her seethe for not being able to do the same. Women are morons.

his name is arnold arnold arnold rimmer

Feel free to look it up

what's crazy about it

omg

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prefer to assume thanks. saves the megabytes.

surprises me every time how people just fall down from one hit to the head.

master and commander. master = the catamite. commander = the pederast

£20 on lucky dips for the euromillions

not me

*nom non nom*
*fap fap fap*
IMA FIRIN' MA LAZER
*nyan cat flies over me*
IT'S OVER 9000!!!! ME GUSTA!

the lottery is just a way to catch time travellers

this website lets you watch all the 24 hours news channels around the world I always have it open

tv.jest.one/

do something about it and spend more time with her fucking weak

this post right here........epic for the win!!!!!!1

what's news in burundi then?

where can I volunteer to help whites only

Thats good. I'm paid next in a week. Maybe ill wait till the following pay on June 13th.

I would like to be a middle class mongberg one day and don't want to fuck up my credit. I'm even thinking about finally taking the plunge and getting a credit card.

I wonder if it’s possible to learn a foreign language as an adult and get good enough to where you sound like a local and get mistaken for one too. I’ve never seen a foreigner who can speak English like this

I reckon sunny weather turns Britons (real white ones) into Australians

hate when you spend time and effort to learn a language only to be conversed with in english

this is true i got turned into an australian when it was sunny the other week
now wondering how to get turned back

to a native is not likely but you can learn it to fluency but you have to basically do learn it nonstop. And as soon as they see you aren't native they will switch to english. Get on Hello and meet your future wife since it's mostly a dating app now.

nah it's the rugged Australian land too, you could never know with your shire ass landscapes

It's not

you must kill the dingo who ate your baby, luke

never met anyone under the age of 40 called richard

Tried that in Paris to order my lunch and the bitch just spoke back to me in English

I once had to talk with a trashy eastenders essex sounding slag woman at work, whose husband and child suddenly appeared, and she thanked me and then started talking in perfect romanian exactly like one of my romanian peers. no idea what she actually was.

Reform UK is extremely moderate, what's the problem?

Couple of pints with the toil gang
A few laughs
Neets living in a desperate solitary world

Japan has so many natural disasters it seems like a really cursed land. Volcanoes. Earthquakes. Mudslides. Floods. Tsunamis. Heatwaves. No wonder they are smart you have to be just to survive there.

we do that on purpose btw

romanians are all like that by all accounts

Really mean btw I wanted to cry

my life is in the fucking pisser

I hope you're being ironic

Patron saint of scranning arses me

NOM NOM NOM

Move onto the minge

NOM NOM NOM

Sweatier the better

Drugs are very social. All the drugmongs have friends.

start up expedition 33

First thing I see is destroyed Paris

Oh yes that's fantastic

Close your eyes and pop this warm sausage in your mouth, master Bruce..

I suppose you could say I’m very bored with my life

THE CITY BREATHING
THE PEOPLE CHURNING
THE CONVERSATING
THE PRICE IS, WHAT?!

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But surely if you’re not Romanian yourself then she could’ve just been and English girl who’s learnt Romanian?

Rekorderlig is fucking rank, tastes like melted down cough sweets. Women drink it when they want to drink and drive without feeling as guilty as having wine.

my pussy literally dried up reading this
sahara desert down there now

Need friends to get them

turn based games are gay and boring its like chess with colourful pictures

Have they improved the flavour of beer yet? Last time I tried it a few years ago it still tasted like ditchwater

I'm in Tempico in Angel if anyone wants a pint

just can't imagine living somewhere where an earthquake can destroy your whole house. The ground moving is scary stuff

pooing a suck willy

ive done everything i wanted to do now im just bored

yes but that's why I was sure to mention I have a romanian coworker and I'm very used to hearing her speak fluent romanian, I know what it sounds like. you could still be right but it's less likely. it wasn't some shakey, clunky romanian, it was liquid.

Women say all this shit and then still stay even though the courts would IMMEDIATELY grant them full custody and financial support.

She's full of shite, should have slapped the silly cow and got your dad a lager out of the fridge

Me if I was a mouth breathing knuckle dragging Neanderthal possessing half a brain cell

Your sweaty flaps would smell better if they were dry at least

no there's plenty of zoomer alcohol sugar drinks now

The ground moving is scary stuff

i got used to it after the first couple of times your mum walked by

you need to built for it. i.e. ready to move at the drop of a hate i.e. when the hat fall off your head because of the earthquake

Buman, Pooey Buman

mumberg says she's going out

expect her to get milk so I just got the BIG cans

she comes back and says she didn't get milk

Fucking Hell I have to go out again

7PM time for dinner
trying out brown rice i heard it's good stuff

give you some payment plan bollocks where they want £30 a month or something else retardedly low

Not the person you're replying to but that's basically my water bill now lel, I pay £32 a month. Do people pay more than that?

Yeah course I don’t doubt she’s fluent but still I reckon only a native speaker would be able to notice small things that give her away when she speaks

genuinely can't taste the difference between white and brown rice.

milk boy loves his milk

Drink a lot of dirxhwathee do you

Earthquakes are kino and fun unless you live in a skyscraper or something like that. It's tsunamis that are actually terrifying. Being stuck in rough water would be a nightmare fucking HATE the ocean

would love to suck the french willy of the single french visitor to this thread at the moment

as the other anon mentioned, the absolute ghouls will charge more and more and more and more each month in the hopes that their victims just don't see a problem, just assume it's getting higher rates, don't notice, etc. and most people won't say anything.

Right so they are woke

Go to Vienna

I've got access to Germany, Poland, Hungary, and Prague via train

Go to Riga

I've got access to Lithuania, Estonia, and MAYBE Moscow or St Petersburg via train

What do lads? If I go to either of these locations next month then I'm absolutely grabbing a train to somewhere for a day or two then heading back

smoking zaza

never bothered attempting to learn another language. never will. i speak English and thats enough.

It’s not exactly worth it all this is it

I think this about places where they have deadly creatures like Australia.

Imagine playing with your willard in the dark and you feel something crawling up your leg followed by a sharp pain. Oops, just been bitten by a fucking spider that is going to have me in agony for the next few hours, rot that part of my leg off or just straight up kill me if I don't get immediate medical attention.

Well it's quite obviously Vienna isn't it

the little one is always angry. manlet energy

mmhmm...

may i say that impala is quite... tame?

Not sure you can just hop on a train to moscow mate

PSA to the gays
the straights will be watching this at 8pm if you're wondering where we are
As you were.

I refuse to play that game because of the fucking terrible name.

CLAIR OBSCUR!!!

Shut up

EXPEDITION 33!!!

What about the other 32? Fuck off

Also I hate the French and literally everything they do, won't be giving them the satisfaction of one extra sale.

polentaberg is cooling before it will be chopped into little triangles and go into panwitz for a fry

Literally tastes of nothing

Corr

football, how bourgeoisie

added butter and a healthy heap of parmesan x

Skipping today's Latin lesson

Ego est wanking instead

corr giz some

not very catholic is it

gay porn type shit

TUMMY HURTING AGAIN
I'M GOING TOTATTLY MENTAL

mad how many cheap £5 chinky chinaman extension leads i've bought off amazon about the flat
definitely going to grenfell the place someday

OMG YAAASS globalist foreign owned megacorporations full of diverse employees!!

get british businesses supported rorke

i should stole a couple from toil

I'm with you polenta and grits are bland rubbish
if you need to add loads of butter and cheese to something to make it taste decent it's not worthwhile

*opens a small pad and starts taking notes*

*flies through the thread*

nicked a crate of masking tape out of toil when i got let go
set for life i am

New

and I don't eat the baby lamb either

preposterously early new
haul him away janitor

Bought one of those USB plugs once to charge some of my devices. One day I could smell burning so I had a look and the thing was fucking melting while charging my kindle. Mental, got it from Amazon too.

Now I just stick to the Anker ones, at least they're a proper brand.

rachel reeves will put a stop to this nonsense BUY BRITISH

once again i am drinking alone in my evil incel smelly childhood bedroom at the age of 26

kicked a dog once

Amazon is full of chinese crap now. It's just Temu but faster with a markup.

Back with the milk, lads

eating connective tissue and sinew

who wants to rub my tummy? if you have the desire to do it you should do it now

mad how many cheap £5 chinky chinaman extension leads i've bought off amazon about the flat

alright that'll be another tariff.

just learned about catholic saints and miracles. what a load of toss!

wanked that freak senseless

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hs?

Football on TV this summer

BBC/ITV

Women's Euro 2025 (England are holders)

Channel 4

Euro U21 2025 (England are holders)

Channel 5

Club World Cup 2025

what to watch?
you have to watch one

wait till you hear about indulgences

face me coward

you may not wank

Downloading the call of duty, going to go shooting some people in the fact later on while having the BIG cans

probably the womens euros while getting up photos of the fit players and imagination wank to them lezzing out and eating each others boxes

aren't you nearly 50?

What about them

i uhh.. have to go for a wee

alright spainl... whoops I mean canslad how are you getting on?

no shooting allowed

Sounds fun. Will be watching peep show all day over on this end.

you now remember Chuck Norris

>Women's Euro 2025 (England are holders)

lezzers

Euro U21 2025 (England are holders)

blacks

Club World Cup 2025

the cup reveal showed it's gonna be a clown show so that one

no cans allowed no tins allowed

why would I ever forget myself?

opium should be legal

87 and I will be larping as Judge Dredd

Wanking in mumber's knickers
Happy?

Dunno what that is, lad
Unless you mean a proper peep show when you have a wank while watching your mum undress

Lad, fuck off with this noncery

legal for me to export in massive quantities to china yes

you better watch it sonny
true

If he only became popular a few years later people would've called him Cuck Norris

Toby

Just seen a pair of fat disgusting English tourists block the fucking road with their massive campervan with trailer attached so they can go into Waitrose since it won’t fit in the car park. I hate these people.

alcohol should be illegal. porn shouldn't be illegal but should be so difficult to access that most people give up.

I send mousey hugs always wherever he may be

wanted millwall to make it tot he playoffs meself

if prostitution was legal porn usage would drop off dramatically

Need to remove every trace that I ever existed an become an alaskan fisherman

I think we have to get rid of the people who want the pornography and the prostitution that's the main thing

it is legal here and porn usage is high, thus disproving your hypothesis

Mental how bitter and angry this made incellious atheists

It pretty much is in the UK

I'd like to live as a fisherman but it's just not needed anymore because of mass fishing and all controlled by the government. no life for a lad on his boat catching a few big ones and selling them to the local fishmonger anymore.

Listening to Blink 182

alri solid snake

It's not really completely legal here though is it

Idiot

Jobcentreberg (actual woman) just left a message on my journal about wanting to crush my bollocks with her shoes

Pope Incellius XXIII

Wait it is? Then why aren't you regarded as a famous sex tourism spot like Amsterdam?

and what would you want in return from them

do I order the salad delivery or what? will it make my tummy better? what do I do?

if they can make a decent lager with no calories or like 10 calories that would be nice tbf

just witnessed a leaf call another leaf an idiot

Public prostitution is not legal as it is in Amsterdam
Also all of our whores are fucking Albanian and shit

All me

I got these little bottles of michelob ultra flavored with prickly pear and lime once on the 4th of july and they were really nice and refreshing out of the icebox and they only had like 90 calories or something but they were also only 4% abv

dunno Amsterdam is a unique city with a well known reputation, prostitution is probably legal in most of western Europe at least in a grey area kinda way

just money

Calories from alcohol don't count

I have a slight cough

waiting for the new x

alri patient zero

It's not the cough that carries you off
It's the coffin they carry you off in

redpill me on Enfield

Got any plans this weekend?

wahey give us another one

Really dont like this. Trump better sort you out

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just fuckien hit my fucken thumb against a brick like fucken fool fuck

Japan

They deserved the nukes

Having access to "escort services" isn't the same thing as a brothel/red light district where you can view women dancing in the window.

Brothels exist in Australia however. It's fucking absurd we're so prudish about the shit in America. UK + America should get to the level of Australia IMO

Fucking science nerds need to pull their finger out and do something useful for once instead of sitting around doing fuck all useless cunts. If we can send man to space we can find away to make a pint only 10 calories

That Kanye song passed 6 million views. I imagine the teenagers will be rejoicing.

in dire need of a dopamine hit

Excuse me they are doing useful stuff

I already told you calories from alcohol don't count

6 million views where?

Why? Don't see why brothels are a good thing

S03 E06

Men talking about calories is literally (in the literal sense) gayer than meeting up and sucking off strange married blokes in a Sainsbury's car park.

ooooh bit too many calories for me!!!

Swallow cum you fucking bent cunt.

Proper mad now.

Why are you seething?

I can't find the lyrics on genius

Long as they're properly regulated such that all the sex workers are willing participants and they don't enable sex trafficking, don't see a problem with them imho

Why does everyone stop posting near the end
Your ritual posts aren't that special just get them out already

brutal blackenings
looming...

Don’t count for what what are you waffling about

Not seeing a problem is different to seeing the benefits, so what are the benefits?

Rogue /brit/ militia fighting for a free kashmir

No plans this weekend then?
Didn't get invited to the gherkin again?
Must hurt to be left out so often :(

and then rorke ate an entire chocolate cake in front of the whole school

mate came back from europe recently and drove the wrong way down a dual carriageway when we went out for a meal last week

did a nasty poo that will be remembered for ages to come

saving my posts for the new

He's a funny guy

You're right. I think alcohol and cigarettes are bad too. Let's just throw everything out that people enjoy which is considered a vice by some

I'll transcribe it myself

Don't count toward your intake balance because ethanol can't be metabolized into fats simple really

idk, additional tax revenue? not everything that's legal has to have inherent benefits

right get it made then

Just talking shit though aren’t you

People get a sexual relief and everyone’s less tense

Not making a strong case here lads

New

Hmm dogshit yank or DTFIC edition?

Decisions, decisions...