/brit/

this could be you if your ancestors were part of mayflower schizos edish

I wanted to make the new for a while now but I've been too slow on the draw. This is the image I wanted to use.

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hot

whenever i want money all i have to do
is toooiiiil
toil toil toooiiil
toooiiiill
only problem is, gee whiz, i'm toiling my life away

my life is just a series of poos and waiting to do the next poo

frying up some liver

your body is a poo gun and eating is how you reload

toilberg hosts a company bbq in the last hour of toil on fridays, had smoked sausages and brisket today, lovely

Philosophia Australiana

ur housetop is poo'd by birds and squirrels

might do roast chicken with gravy and mashed taties and peas
truly a staple dinner of the white man

my arse is chambered in .454 Casull

love a roast chook, so easy to do yet so tasty
and then you can use the leftovers to put in a big sandwich or mix with pasta coorrr

shudder to think what kind of people would actually use this new

mine's chambered in 12 gauge, i often have explosive diarrhoea you see

gaming is horrible on linux, going to commit to switching this time and will just say good bye to it

arousing homosexual desire

but Anon Babble told me all games work fine on linux these days

need one of those council jobs where i get paid $90 an hour to stand around holding a sign (while most likely drunk)

I've heard daedra worship is becoming increasingly prevalent in the Summerset Isles.
I've heard others say the same.
Be seeing you.

they do mostly on proton and with proprietary drivers, it's just that settings for essential hardware is never 1:1 and impossible to replicate between operating systems
take a pro from whatever e-sports team and make him play the same game on linux. guarantee his performance tanks

got something for you, your hands only
*gives you a piece of paper with a cock drawn on it*

Watching the tube

no like one of those people who ushers traffic through on roadwork sites

does the remaster of 'blivion still have all the classical NPC jank then?

please stop replying to me mate.

got that kanye song stuck in my head

does he have any songs where he says nice things about hitler?

heh
It does.

Listening to it on repeat all morning haha

Why was it always a golf sale

might illegally emigrate to america
i'm not a beaner so they can't deport me

zeedbelg no where to be found

egyptian retard replying to everything with nonsense

curious

it is surprisingly catchy, I wish it was longer

Come to Oregon <3 gov will give you free shit

no real need to be drafting conspiracy theories about this though is there? even if you're correct (which i doubt), no one cares

mr bond is the superior nazi rapper if im honest

youtuberg has ublock origin on the ropes

you know what's funny? christianity
screaming

every time they try and force me to turn it off I just refresh a few times and it works again

might sneak into that box thing in mecca that all the muzzies rotate around after hours and do a graffiti mural that depicts muhammad

don't get it

allah's always watching thoughbeit

Arse is chock-full of farts this morning

wonder if pakis and iranians and indonesians and other non-arab muslims feel alienated by the arab-centric stance of islam

Need a soft lovely women to fondle the knob

feel like utter shit

I've had a cold but I've been megadosing vitamin c so I simultanously feel amazing

the world is healing

don't think i've ever met or heard of a japanese person (born in japan) who was perfectly fluent in english
plenty of fluent chinks, plenty of fluent koreans, never japs though

apparently they don't like to speak English because they're really embarrassed about their accent but I dunno how true that is

how the fuck is WHSmith operating there?

wow all i have to do is buy 3?

Chicken tenderloins, lightly fried, with a honey sweetened dijon mustard sauce

the french also seem to be noticeably bad at english too, pretty much all continentals are fluent in english but i think the french are more stubborn about it because they're butthurt about historical rivalries with england or something

One for each wife

yeah that's definitely because they're butthurt. Every single Frog speaks perfect English they just hate to admit it

nice weather but these aren't normal temperatures for april. it's not supposed still ca winter chill in the morning and sipping forward to july tier heatwave in the afternoon.
we're gonna be absolutely cook in july and august

gagging for a pack of smokes but i'm too drunk to drive to the shops

mishima

i hate fish and don't eat any seafood at all but i find videos of people making sushi fascinating

what if chelsea are actually beaten by real benis

How'd Sneako manage to weasel his way into Kanye's circle?

just looked that up, if you're referring to yukio mishima sounds like that guy was an absolute mad lad

hublot incoming

don't you lads have pakis on bikes who can bring you overpriced cigs when you're steaming?

Doing a poo

more like gay masochist wrongun

all his niggas nazis

kek

don't think so, maybe in the inner city but i'm a semi-rural suburbanite

mad it's like living in the third world

people actually unironically deliveroo ciggies or booze

Now beginning season 3 peep show

i also do it ironically

lady people will pay for anything if it's convenient, this is why these delivery services are making cash hand over fist in this country

speaking of pakis im gonna go on a hajj to the corner shop for some milk
might even treat myself to a chocolate bar you never know

i hate the fucking city, there's nowhere to park and hidden toll chieckpoints everywhere and nary a single non-slanty eye in sight

I like to deliveroo as much booze and bacon as possible in a single order so their backpacks are bursting with haram

lady people

women or troonards?

Nigga, heil Hitler
Nigga, heil Hitler

for me it's big suze

Are the deliveroo drivers pakis rather than nigs with you?

Your order will be late, if God is willing

growing up is realising sophie was right

grim grim grim

whomever designed the scottish parliament building was playing a grand old game of silly buggers

why is the english on top of the squiggly lines? kind of cucked ngl

genuinely what kind of autism is it that provokes someone to do the same sequence of 6 posts or so every day

aboslutely devastated that deliveroo was bought by doordash. if the branding changes I will have a melty

just door dashed some pesto pasta for breakfast

this goes beyond autism, it's some kind of severe OCD or schizotypal illness

that's the takeaway toast ordered

Was it a couple years ago like 2015 or was it an entire decade ago?

Yes I am a cuck I like it when people fuck on my bitch

Broooooos

Emma Watson does poops and farts on the reg.

single jar of biscoff spread ordered from tesco home delivery

So does everyone else on earth.

not jair bolsonaro. he got a cork up his arse that only doctors can pull out

Good morning to all National Socialists.

This ugly bitch killed her kid when she was 22 weeks pregnant. But no one cares in fact they are actually angry at the police for investigating her

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wish chatgpt wouldn't end most of its responses with follow-up questions and peer pressuring me into conversations i never intended to have

has your gf ever sat on the loo squeezing out a poo with the door open while you wander in and out of the bathroom talking to her as you get ready for work?

reading MEIN KAMPF by Adolf Hitler

no. never had a gf.

Got the new kanye song in my heads lads

Gonna get sent to giga jail if I sing it out loud by accident

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You can tell it to stop doing that

tried looking for that in the public library but they said they didn't have it, can't buy it online anywhere either, nor is it on any audiobook services
curious

no you wont

Is it weird to go back to uni if I already have a (meme) degree?

dunno how you get that shit song stuck in your head
normies are just weird

you can and it will for a while but it won't last

what a disgusting wrinkly old bat

like super weird omg

rorke wants more leftypol kids raised by blue haired leftypol mum

size of that forehead

don't know where to direct my energies. I am full of energy, but don't know what do focus on. career? women? body? don't know what me in 10 years would want

wonder if hitler's living relatives get royalties for people buying mein kampf

brown fella on a bike on his way to hand me a single boiled egg

rorke the type of nigga to leave comments on pornhub videos

no the copyright expired 10 years ago

all their lads brought their missuses to the pub yesterday after toil
me on my lonesome of course
what a JOKE

we should give britain to the houthis

100th anniversary of Mein Kampf later this year

kanye should print a commemorative edition

mein kampf is 704 pages? having a fucking laugh, i refuse to read anything longer than 400

leftlypol the kind of nigga to leave likes on pornhub videos via the facebook plugin

lass at work we call manure mandy because she stinks

Just can’t imagine 77 year old betty seeing this and going yeah I’ll pop oxfam in my will

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if not for gay prussian militarism the third reich would have been a communist utopia and we would be living int he star trek universe by now

dont his relatives live in complete secret somewhere in the usa

#enslavenigs2k25

if youre in a nursing home and youve got no family then they will force you to do this
what can do you

some of them do yeah i think so

the wife wants a third child lads

reckon I probably have a similarly hurtful nickname amongst my colleagues
bet they do impressions of me too

Some freaaakkkyyyy porn comes out of Britain

why

boomers are woke

i keep falling asleep. i hate breakfasttoil. please come and cook it for me

we still can't compete with the Germans though

just get it delivered lad

I'm 25yo and my 24yo co-worker has a 3 year old kid and a loving wife. getting family mogged hard, at what age is it too late to have children?

dont live in a metropolis

my mum had me at 39 so you've got time
I turned out a bit wrong tho so there's that aha

My parents had me at 29 and my sister at 35. And this is back when people and kids younger than today you’ll be fine

mad how i still live at home and the lads who didnt go to university drive bmws and have wives, multiple children and own their own house

you and your little sister ever kissed in a non-sibling way?

Britain is literally the capitol of pedophilia and noncery. It is quite literally the Paedolph Isles.

Weird cunt

what did you study? are you successful?

never graduated. unemployed and in my overdraft

Might move to Britain.

how long did you go before dropping out?

I drive a Audi and I’m 23 but I still live at home hope this makes you feel better

I've just failed to hand in my dissertation lol
pretty sure I can redo it in summer, if not I've just wasted 4 years of my life

4 years

wot if i shagged ya bum

Uh u-usual suspects… right guys?

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I'd probably put up some resistance before my mind melts and I let you have your way with me

mad how people can inject their willy into the crevices of other people

irish and welsh diaspora

mad how im 29 reading this and have no chance of having a kid in the next 5 years

not trying to be edgy or a woke but i never got what the problem with abortion is

had a terrible fever dream last night was trapped in this pure white dimension made out of black dotted lines of various arrangements eventually I found the exit and it send me up to another layer on this bouncing piston thing and that cycle repeated for eternity

two sons so far
she wants a daughter too

sounds like you've got until around 38yo, so start hitting the gym and careermaxxing, incel

no, not the usual suspects in this case. hope that helped

i hit the gym already and have a career, im just a mentalcel spastic that lives with family

maybe your great great great grandad shouldn't have stolen that spoon

Lay off the petrol sniffing BamBam

dont want children. dont want to sacrifice at least 2 decades of my life on family

why do italians eat various kinds of pasta drowned in tomato sauce for every meal? must get boring after a while

tastes nice

becauase they spend all their time shagging and living in beautiful locales

italian diaspora do it too and a lot of them live in shitholes like new jersey

know a bloke with six kids because the first five were daughters and he / they desperately wanted a son

the guy that likes the eddie hall shite ennit

wat

twas just a joke

this is Radio Freedom

prefer the yank version of ramsay's kitchen nightmares even though it's overly bombastic and probably largely staged, the uk version is too quiet and boring

last round vs toilberg, let's be avin you

*bows my boxer briefs back with my hands and flings them across the room at you*

prefer kitchen nightmares australia with that northern irish guy

Wat?

Older. Fatter. Balder.

why does ramsay have two different versions of his show
must be quite tiresome

*comes into your kitchen with a tv camera*

Christ is king

mad how this statement has been tarnished
just reeks of brown hands

of the jews

neurotic freak with the crazed evil work ethic seen often in men like hitler, lenin, jimmy carr.

Had company every day for the past week

i resent that

Do not let it hapen.

perfect zoo weather this weekend

which zoos in the UK would you recommend?

i follow the tribunal religion of the dunmer from the elder scrolls games.

Summon to my house I will knock you good.

london, birmingham, bradford.

/brit/, some absolute creatures in here

*threatens you with a large butcher knife*

it would be fun to larp as a pagan in the uk. Stonehenge and all that. im sure there’s a big community for it and you could meet loads of people

I am beginning huh

most of them are probably insufferable drugmong hippies who dont shower
or they're varg level schizophrenics

German.

*positions the boom mic above you*
*puts cameras to LIVE feed*
*records*

Woburn Safari Park

Knight.

feel the last remnants of my youth slipping away from me. My 30s loom, and tough decisions need to be made

ktim

So.

36 this year me and living my best life

looking at 10 years in prison for serious fraud, me

I have a mental illness

got my post booze poo due

if this is real you will explain your situation

Been telling women youre handsome?

the serioues fraud is the lie in your post!

nuh-uh-uh, my legal counsel has advised me not to discuss the details of my case with anyone

Random.

tough decisions need to be made

You saw me?

what do you think of /brit/ botlad?

What?

havent smoked in a very long time but i'd love to order dude weed off the internet legally and smoke it for a treat, but because it's drug tested and stays in your system forever that is not feasible

the decisions will be tough, but they'll have to be made.

Which one?

Cool.

i think people who butter their sandwiches are weird and wrong and should probably be executed

you get drug tested often at work? I've only been drug tested once at it was for an American company (costco), I hear you guys do alot of drug testing.

Plan on joining the FBI is it?

seen numerous posts (by australian flags as well) make fun of us for not buttering our bread

Let's keep it between us.

wish we'd legalise it

It's nice but you will get fat very quickly and it can tear apart the bread

well they're wrong
it's you and me against the world my circumcised friend

Brushing my orange rat teeth

yes unfortunately
they would turn me away as soon as they saw my post history

Cool.

got a new dealer number from colleague today, no longer have to do a massive trip to get weed, score, gonna get a 'lil 7g for the weekend and play some civ 6

we the jury find the defendant Catberg GUILTY

Listen you fuck.

grow up

Buy my weed at the shop down the road me

Not my problem.

schizoid

I'm only 29

ktim when i went on holiday to canada

I am 21.

Do you agree with the diagnosis? Or do you think the doctors have got it wrong?

thing i miss the most about weed are the fap sessions ngl
'wanking' as you call it is great high

no I definitely agree

morning dee lads x

I will tear you apart.

The Wandering Poo

The international poo

Good.

Not exaggerating, they are some of the worst, most insufferable people you will ever meet.

They're disgusting hippies but not the harmless stoner kind, they're smug freaks and think they've cracked some code to life because they larp as druids. They need nailing to a cross

lads I don't drive, does a car alarm just go off indefinitely until the owner stops it

there's been one blaring outside my room for 5 minutes now

just done some unspeakable horrors in the downstairs toilet

Good.

Okay.

This.

yeh

Desperately need a clue

Get the fuck out!

it's finally stopped but it's definitely woken the entire street up

cars do NOT need alarms this is outrageous

it friday guys. Make the most of the weekend x

Fuck off!

it

how come you want to rape children?

I work Saturdays actually, but I get Monday off :)

im off to a wedding

I will put your head under a car wheel and ask god.

mad there was a bank holiday this week. Doesn't seem right

I will ask.

Good.

i

Cool.

love

Nonsense.

eating

Don't know.

poo

Okay.

kill more monsters to get one to drop you're just unlucky