/brit/

LOVELY FUCKING DRINKING FUCKING CANS edish

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just became gay

IT DOES NOT SMELL

IT DOES NOT SMELL

IT DOES NOT SMELL

IT DOES NOT SMELL

IT DOES NOT SMELL

IT DOES NOT SMELL

your hero is a fat middle aged man, enjoy it zoomer. enjoy being blamed for everything and then having the generation after blame you for everything after.

popping down teaco lads

This is a bit awkward, but here goes.

I was using my wife's phone the other day, and when I went to type something in her browser beginning with 'P', you guessed it, Pornhub popped up.

No big deal - we both watch porn from time to time when we're alone and have agreed it's not an issue in our relationship.

But then I noticed the types of videos she has been watching. 'Big d***s', 'huge d***s', 'BBC', 'BWC' (google it)... and the worst of all, 'Wife cheats with big d***'.

At first, I made a joke about it, thinking she'd laugh it off as mere curiosity.

Then she told me it's 'a fantasy all women have' but that I shouldn't worry about it 'because it's just porn'.

Now I can't stop thinking about it, and it's shattered my confidence. I know I'm on the right side of average down there, but I am absolutely not 'huge'.

I've never once worried about my size but now I fear I'll never be enough for her.

dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-14414971/I-stumbled-wifes-Pornhub-search-history-broken-told-just-fantasy-lots-women-fear-Ill-never-SAUCY-SECRETS.html

no you're not
be quiet

mumberg made dinner for the first time in over a decade and it tastes fucking horrible
that generation is allergic to any sort of seasonings, aye?
to make matters worse she's makde a truckload of it
ghastly overconfidence

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the more you learn about history the more you realise that nothing ever happens

should've asked her to get a big juicy arse on the go

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cute british gf with social anxiety and never leaves her room wanted. must be biologically female

*slaps knees*
Right then!
Off to the cans shop for the BIG cans
And for the chips, I'm not fucking sure, lads.
What do you reckon is good?

what about the sack of rome
what about the fall of constantinople

solution is to just have a big dick right? okay that's that sorted.

nothing. ever. happens.

Then she told me it's 'a fantasy all women have' but that I shouldn't worry about it 'because it's just porn

didnt men say this before it was revealed women all goon too?

LOOKS DO MATTER.

femail is just erotic fiction for the boomer slags to strum one out to

Rorke telling everyone that his stocks are falling when he has £30 invested

that generation is allergic to any sort of seasonings, aye?

doing a watch of trump commenting on the stock market crash
he literally says joe biden cost 6 billion jobs to be lost

i guess history by its essence is a list of all the things that did happen
not much on the things that didn't, as it were

got dadberg to come over to my flatstein to unblock toiletwitz
don't know how to do it myself you see

Someone has to stop him

what about world war two
what about the communist revolution in russia

based get to work dadstein

That can't be true, for every thing that did happen I bet I can give you three ways it didn't happen

you stick your hand in a binbag and then stick it round the u-bend

Literally me except I only have (had) £2000 invested

listen pal, I've been on this earth 33 years, longer than you I'd bet. in that time, what's happened? nothing. and nothing will happen. we exist in a post-happening society. it's over. NOTHING. EVER. HAPPENS.

The biggest mistake normies make when cooking is using salt too sparsely

you got a girlfriend yet?

Holding my breath to heighten my state of arousal

I already said nothing ever happens

got Have I Got News for You on
it's what Diego would've wanted

fondling a poo as it were

starting a warehouse job monday, the two year NEET streak has ended

finna bust a fat nut to that asian chick on the facialabuse

The Coping: Episode 2

got a pot of shit boiling away on the hob

le west has fallen.....
the stock has gone down 10%......
we wont last 5 years......
it is truly over.......

Is this it then?
Great Depression 2.0?

Paul Merton making a joke about tariffs
I didn't get it but I laughed anyway

you will own nothing and be happy

congrats
actually don't regret warehousetoil me. been doing it for six months, CV looks better and I've lost a stone in weight

feels good knowing my assets can depreciate all they want i still get enough through income i don't have to worry and just keep buying the dip

nobody wants this dudes coffee

is it a dolphin in a barf tub?

but dude nothing ever happens xd so they won't happens

every
accusation
is
a
confession

boyish coy look

so Britain's been shit for near on two decades now, when do we get a comeback? every other country gets some small wins every now and then

correct

we won the euros and the olmypics

nice need to lose a few kg will be good to move around a bit

Starmer is such an embarrassing man. Hyper liberal. Looks like an impotent old man. No muscle. No dignity. Cringe every time I see him on telly.

Even Blair (Piss Be upon Him) or Cameron looked better.

yeah but no swing music, now it's electro-swing

he looks like a chad actually

can't win the Olympics (who got most golds) no one cares about euros

US withdrawing from Chinese market

Why don’t we just take their place and make bank?

every time i see him i just think "imagine grabbing his nipples and jiggling his man titties"
weak soft pasty man

I like starmer, starmer haters just be hating

divorce her

£75 for the new mariokart

nintendobabby's are retarded

why the fuck aren't you living on a house boat on one of the many canals across england

he looks like a teacher to me

don't want to live on a boat thanks

we can offer fine British products and services such as............

The football

what stocks (and how) do i buy with the upcoming recession lads?

You guys ever be on Anon Babble too much and you want to dunk your head in an anti-Anon Babble cleansing tank that rinses your brain?

Volatility in the stock market shouldn’t be a massive concern unless you’re daytrading at a hedge fund.
Buy and hold and check back in 5 years time.

he'll be looking down from gay heaven and smiling

We're consumers retard, brown people and chinks do the slave work while we do the service work

mental how you slant eye enthusiasts are desperate to be stuck in a sweatshop for 70 hours a week

would be cold in winter, less space and none of the advantage of scenic travel because i have to go to work
also i heard about how if you park somewhere other boats will park next to you for safety in numbers, but that would be annoying

No-one here would be brave enough to take on Anon Babble and its Nintendo customer army
You even shiver at the prospect of answering a phone call

I have done, most of my price average is from buying in 3-5 years ago
The fact remains this crash is entirely from self inflicted and pointless stupidity

I intentionally paid a bit more for my house than it's worth to drive up house prices in my area and weed out the scruffs and scrotes. Gentrifying my area as it were

the "you're too scared to answer the phone" tranny is back

leftypol turning a blind eye to this one

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stock market so bad brokerberg sent out an anti-suicide email

oh my CHRIST

The government will inevitably dump thousands of darkies in your area within a few short years anyway so a futile exercise

no point panicking we will see what's what in a week's time

Zoomers are ESL thirdies, spiritually speaking

there's a drunk man outside and you simply won't believe what he's doing

hate them so much lads

my stock went up 11% today

got the tretinoin 0.5 in the post lads

Once this hayati vape is finished I'm done with vaping forever, this time for real. Shan't be dulling my youthful glow with nicotine and Chinese chemicals anymore. Shall be on the skinmaxxing routine so I can stay peng.

The problem is, I think it's so engrained in my parrot that I worry he'll never stop saying it. This has damaged my brother's mental health.

my lower back hurts

Lads, didn't get the cans.
Got distracted drawing instead

I'll get dressed and get the BIG cans now, promise

this has to be a joke doesn't it
no way thousands of people are reading this deadly serious without even a little grin on their face

can you help me move my mattress?

Got distracted drawing instead

drawing what?

new

dude I made that, praise me for it

cringe

Learning to draw people
My new idea for what to do at the toil is to spend the few hours I have free drawing people

Once saw a Tweet that said transgenderism was to white nerds what crack was to the blacks

Staying in a guesthouse for a wedding tomorrow and the thing's run by a bloody African woman
Can hear her in the breakfast room now facetiming her relatives at monkeyworld
No mention of this on the website
Might leave a nasty review if breakfast doesn't go well

Doesn't have a favourite book
Doesn't have a favourite poem
Doesn't dream
Has no childhood fears
Has no inner monologue
Never thought about whether he's an extrovert or introvert
No passions or hobbies outside of football
Has no real pride in Britain before the beginning of the NHS

This man was grown in a lab

why the new Mario Kart and Donkey Kong game costs $80

no mtx or in-game ads

do hot girls work nightshift jobs?

you're meant to reduce stock! No wonder British food is so bad

shut up you stupid cunt

I recently purchased my newly purchased first home a few months ago and now trump is causing a worldwide recession. I'm scared I'm gonna lose my job and I still have most of my mortgage to pay

oh be quiet

That would be hilarious if blacks were not trannies more per capita.

Mental how it's 2025 and you lot are still falling for the 'NO, DEFINITELY THIS TIME TRUMP HAS FUCKED UP'
They'll stop talking about this in a week and you'll be talking about the next thing.
Grow up.

Honestly that just sounds like the average British man

That's what new games cost these days, rorke

he's alright, don't need him to crack jokes

Katy is working

She at the Gherkin twerking

lmao

no, only lads do. the hot girls cheat on them during the day.

sir kier agent 47

poo

once worked night shift with one genuinely very fit girl and another goth one who i would've absolutely shagged, they both moved on after a few months though. was nice talking with them, nothing more happened because i'm an utter fanny

I’ve been saying for ages we’re due a second Great Depression around March/April 2025

Doesn’t matter if it’s Donald Trump or Donald Duck in the white house. The world economy has been built on imaginary numbers for so long and they have printed so much money to offset debt they created that it’s about to just implode on itself.

LUV natural girls

Why the fuck are the people in charge of the world so fucking evil lads? We live in an age where the average person lives in better conditions than royalty 200 years ago but our evil fucking government wants to harm and genocide us

all the london street webcams are offline x

Obese hog, bet her crack smells vile

not everyone is as sweet as you

What do you think RFK Jr and Brand's combined shag count is

She a tranny?

i hope so, would lick that shit up

hannah fry is fucking FIT

just shoved a poo up my arse

no leftypol, that is an obvious biological woman and your attempt to sow confusion won't work

Can't talk about Brand now
He's been charged

MPs have accused HM Revenue and Customs (HMRC) of putting savers at risk over new plans to automatically seize unpaid taxes from bank accounts.

Account holders who fail to pay their tax debts face having their bank accounts raided by HMRC under new powers confirmed after the Spring Statement.

However, MPs and tax advisers accused the tax authority of going “a step too far” in its attempts to close the tax gap.

Others sounded the alarm over the risk of errors, and warned savers would have to go to court to reclaim incorrectly seized payments.

The human condition plus the natural conclusion of liberal capitalist democracy ending in plutocratic globalised NWO.

The one good thing about Europe pre French Revolution is that the king and nobles were always accountable to society and had to serve for life. They couldn’t fuck up and pass the buck or let the next guy deal with it. Commoners had less say in how things were run but knew that they were not at fault and knew exactly who ruled over them

got the burial on

she looks like a draugr with orange hair

Why does she look like a fucking tranny then

Yeah we need a Great Depression and mass unemployment for… reasons….

THIRD poo of the day, bumberg taking the piss now

Was just thinking about when that yank went on a rant for hours because some lad put a picture of Daisy Ridley as the /brit/ edish.

Diego broke kayfabe a few too many times for my liking

She doesn't, she looks like a woman because she is.

mad how gay porn poo peng

that one's genuinely mental

Charged: This means someone has been formally accused of a crime by law enforcement or a prosecutor. Charges are typically filed after an arrest or investigation, but being charged doesn’t mean guilt has been proven—it’s just the starting point of the legal process.

Indicted: An indictment is a formal accusation issued by a grand jury (in jurisdictions that use them, like the U.S.). It comes after the prosecution presents evidence, and the grand jury decides there’s enough to proceed to trial. Being indicted is a step beyond being charged and signals a case is moving forward, but it still doesn’t mean guilt.

Convicted: This means a person has been found guilty of a crime, either through a trial (by a judge or jury) or by pleading guilty. A conviction happens after the legal process has run its course and guilt is officially determined.

Condemned: This typically refers to someone who has been sentenced to death after a conviction (in places where the death penalty exists). It’s a specific outcome of sentencing, not just a finding of guilt. More broadly, it can also mean strong disapproval, but in a legal sense, it’s tied to capital punishment.

yeah mad that

refuse to believe a single bloke has ever came hands free by shoving things up his arse

thank 'gpt

Mind once a yank posted a screenshot of a (you) he had gotten years prior

lads someone go in the kitchen and grab me one of my bananas

Okay what now

maybe you're thinking of philosophy tube

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remember when spaki had a meltdown for 48 hours straight (no sleep) and he'd post the same thing every thread, every hour.

lionesses changing rooms sweaty aroma

tarrifs don't work

Yeah

Looks at Germany after it blocked english goods

Oh

The Irish
The blacks
The bloody pakistanis

Listening to Educating Ricky.

No she's a jew

lsniffing eah williamson sweaty footy kit

optimal accuracy ratio achieved

It is genuinely mental how confusing foreigners find the fact that we're a Country made up of four Nations, just cannot wrap their head around it.

The Irish took our side during the Southport riots

The 19th century is over, all white men must be united against the common brown

phwoar

why is google forcing me to scroll past AI before i can get to the real answer

was just saying that to the lads down the pub

Imran Hameed the chancer

She's of English and Irish descent Rorke, give it a rest please.

yeah?

Did an irl you see post today lads

No it isn't
All of Africa, South America, Canada, Scandinavia, Russia, China, India, Indonesia et al. are like that

You're "foreigners" only include western Europe and the us

The globalists are a far more threatening presence to the survival of the Irish people than the Crown ever was

irish, welsh, scots and london easy peasy

america has gone insane

I didn't say every single foreigner now did I smart lad?

Hayfeverberg got me on the ropes
Imagine being allergic to grass, state of it

loooool

heathermongo turbomindraped by netflix slop and april fools jokes

oh my days

No but you're post excludes 95% of foreigners as known to the UK population so it's ignorant and idiotic

dis nibba sneezing at leafs

got mental health because i thought about the last kingdom and how much me and the ex gf enjoyed watching it together and how much I miss her and now im just sat all alone in my smelly childhood bedroom and she’s probably out getting shagged by other men right now

you've been done

blgo on

cheer up arseling

Oh bore off

gay porn screaming in a n'ggers face

just dont think about her

have you seen vikings

heathermongo

turbomindraped

netflix

the trifecta of foolishness

this the ex gf of 3.5 years is it?

I wish I were link or cloud

remember

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Get on the PIP and get yourself a nice new beemer for free lad

Might get 8 hours sleep
Nice little treat

was a covid era relationship mate, doomed to fail right from the start

grow up

dont think im capable of love

Daft Punk is playing at my house. My house.

I took study Deanoism

she could be shagged by other women didn't think about that old bean rorke

shoo shoo stinky monkeys!!

must be nice to be a deano with no worries

rorke's castle

my £5 earphones struggling to pump tinny music into my prolapsed earholes

why did this post get 10 replies

so you're saying it's a bad idea to buy a car from a man named imran

just don't worry about them x

deanos get mental health too lads x

getting the badge in

what are some worries of yours?

i bet it's not that serious

how old are you really

howling at all these (you)’s

they are so fucking fit lads

tinnitusberg doing me in

unpeel it and stick it down my throat

screaming

health
wealth
relationships

ignorance is bliss

Lol facts

Starmer is an ineffectual man.

I actually quite liked Cameron. Sexually.

deano has plenty of worries, i know them. deano has the same worries you do.

Look up the Thai massage parlours in your local area and see what the Google reviews are

If it's entirely men posting then you know what's what

yeah but he doesn't worry about them

my mate is balding and he knows it and he's that depressed by it I don't even have the heart to make fun of him for it
can tell it's really getting him down

Diego was the Christopher Biggins of /brit/

aha me when I'm hungover lookin at the dominos menu ahaaaa xxxxxx

ktimmers

Farting it up in the smelly childhood bedroom

how old is he?

wahey slags slags slags

umm, is this real?

SO IF YOU'RE LONELY

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33

but looks dont matter haha xx

could have been worse, at least he had good 20's

Lovely Asian ladies

oof

I tried to tell him this, but I think hearing that from someone with no balding at all doesn't mean anything to him.

Dailymail's doing reddit-tier fake stories now?

there's always plugs

only for 129 years lad

anime fit corrrrr

so this is rorke

I think there’s been a rape up there!