jupiter
/brit/
Jupiter is a useless and shit planet. Saturn and Mercury are literally more useful
Mental how there are still people in the Year of Our Lord 2024 that still see adverts.
transmen are MEN
transwomen are MEN
sex work isn't WORK
business idea: yeast-free bread (or yeast substituted) for prisons
Yeast-free for the least-free!
Men are from Mars
Transwomen are from Venus
this is a disgusting thing to say
I can't quite get myself to pay for YouTube to avoid ads on mobile/TV
business idea: infective e. coli GMO strain which produces alcohol like yeast or - uniquely - morphine both from sugar, and smuggle it into prisons
don't mind a few adverts now and then, it's kind of like a periscope through which i can observe normie culture from my smelly bedroom
Saturn
shalom
The only European in history to have an entire period of warfare named after them.
Admittedly it has been less useful since your mum overtook it as the largest object in the Solar System.
business idea infective e. coli GMO strain which does that, and you infect everyone in the prison anyways, and then you sell to people the knowledge that they can ferment their toilet poops
doom scrolling
Sir Vote Loser
it costs more than my phone bill now, fuck that for a laugh hey
imageswarfare
GET
HER
IN
Bro is still making "your mum so fat" jokes in 2024...
EVERYONE GET AS MANY VOTES IN AS YOU CAN FOR THIS PETITION
what do you mean it's being botted?
I'll tell you something that's not so funny. Right now, Keir Starmer is at home, crying like a little girl!
Your phone bill is only $15 a month?!?
how do you get a job as a prison nurse? i want to shadow one. not because of my unrelated last post which i think is a good money making idea irl moneymaking
Must have gone to lightspeed within your mothers gravity and ended up in the future
>what do you mean it's being botted?
Freemason Rothschild shill
fat girls rule the world
I am caught within your mother's immense gravity well, so time moves more slowly here.
you lads trying to set a world record for most prime minister turnovers in a decade?
How does gravity make something go into lightspeed
is the prison warden anon in? i saved a meme for them 2 days ago to wait for them to show up. unrelated to my last post
Now see this was much better than the light speed one
$12.50 a month
Not sure about the physics
Temporary discounts don't count
I'm embarrassed to be so obsessed with jews but I can't help it
it just makes me feel really intelligent and that I'm aware of everything so I feel good about myself and not so scared
thats ok to feel. its normal to want safety
not temporary, it's just a cheap plan, i don't need that much data, rarely even use more than a gigabyte of data per month
they don't call them the Hitler wars
that's how great he was
it's completely retarded and so are you
If you're meant to buy someone a "$50 gift" and find a $50 item on discount, it is still a $50 item regardless of how much you personally paid for it.
Some people will illogically argue against this
Told my trans gf to prep her hole for a sexing tonight
FRENCH ANON ENZO
IS FIGHTING WITH HIS FATHER
Do you have shcizo on your general too ?
vocaroo.com
everythings gonna be ok for you
Jews are just the middle management level of the global power structure. The real bosses are people you have never heard of.
oh yeah which provider?
TPG
edit: holy fucking hell these captchas are ridiculous
RORKEfellers either stopped making termally ill people the CEO or one of them managed to complete the institutes mission
a gun murder denial cited only
as we grew beef hence eat less llama yourself
just because gelatin will annoy metal discs in ointment
WHAT did I SAY about NOT TEMPORARY?
is that swimming in it?
edit:
huh????!???
it's dissolving
reminder to order 2 new bank cards per year to collect them as each one contains £0.10 worth of gold in the chip
it's not temporary for me mate the doctor gave me 5 months to live
I'd thank you to be more sensitive in future
The real bosses are the Order of the White Rainbow and they live underground in Greenland and have dark magical powers.
it isn't temporary, they must not be offering the same rate as i get on a permanent basis to new customers anymore, in which case you missed out haha sucked in
I give you 5 seconds to live
it da jew!
da jew man comin!
ohhh lawd!
I have heard the term Alexandrian Wars around before. There are also the Mithridatic Wars. But I take your point since they're not necessarily discrete periods of warfare.
just taking the mick m8, i've been struggling with captchas all day and don't want to have to solve a captcha just to complain about captchas so i included it with a post i was already going to make, it's synergistic isn't it?
its so hard to get up out of bed like to go pee or whatever, even when its not cold
I can eat cheddar and sour cream ruffles if I feel like it heheheheheh
ahhh bullshit I've been with them since 2021
Brit music is good
the yuuzhan vong didn't use normal technology with electricity but they had extremely advanced biotechnology that included organic ships and even a biological network of organisms which could share information through hyperspace like a biological version of the Holonet
it's the japs eye of the tiger
it's the wee of the shite
lol Family Guy did an episode about those moms
Also the Yuuzhan Vong were largely immune to most Force powers. For example a Jedi trying to Force push a Yuuzhan Vong would have no effect on him.
well i've been with them since idk 2019 i think
i'm 30 years old with no job, no gf, and no friends. it is over for me. the west has fallen.
moms
FOY
also, what moms?
Also the Yuuzhan Vong could not be intimidated by the threat of pain. They actually enjoyed pain.
update on McDonalds and related (beer) e. coli outbreak youtube.com
youtube.com
Look on the bright side mate
Didn't know maccas sold beer
business plan: enslave american /brit/ posters, turn them into girls, make them clean the house while wearing cute uniforms
beef*
imagine putting out a song like sandstorm and travelling the world to play it non stop
They do in Germany.
here is the good video about it youtube.com
Did you know that only about half of the Star Wars galaxy was explored and mapped out and part of the civilization known as the Galactic Republic or Empire?
The other half was called the Unknown Regions. Very few people dared to venture into this half of the galaxy. There was one planet in the Unknown Regions that had a sentient intelligence and a connection to the Force. It was called Zonoma Sekot. It was temporarily conquered by the Yuuzhan Vong.
No mice
i thought i had another energy drink, but i dont, and i might just finish this one read and go to bed
fuck me, why are data caps still a thing?
fuark moy cunt
pokemon starts getting boring around the time you discover sex
thinking about british bussy again....
Maxmoefoe is married
Having a midlife crisis?
appreciate the empty platitudes mate but there is no bright side, and you know this because if there were a bright side you'd give an example as to what it is
/brit/ is under threat of invasion.
And though you may be on the far side of the world, this thread is our home. This thread is England.
The Yuuzhan Vong had a torture device called the Embrace of Pain which was like a rack of tendrils which would wrap around you and they were covered in sharp thorns which injected a venom into you and it was extremely painful.
The avian Sith Vergere tortured Jacen Solo with it and it was through this that Jacen became immune to pain. Later in life he could take brutal injuries and keep fighting like he barely felt it.
The bright side is that it's summer where you are
I'm so broken
if there were a bright side you'd give an example as to what it is
you have plenty of free time, no girl blagging your head and attention and no friends to distract you. blog on life is a two sided coin. its your mindset that will change your life not someone else.
mmm laudanum
Used to run 10 miles a day and averaged 60 miles a week.
Now I can't run for more than half a fucking hour, just isn't fair
.<
>opioidlad
Jacen later became Darth Caedus and he fought his uncle Luke Skywalker in a vicious duel on his flagship above Kashyyyk. They both wounded each other severely.
Jacen got stabbed in the stomach and got part of his scalp burned off by Luke's lightsaber.
Luke got his ribs broken by a roundhouse kick from Jacen and he also nearly choked to death in the tendrils of the Embrace of Pain which Jacen threw at him.
They both took weeks to recover from the fight.
tarqs between the dawn of time to 1960 = fucking cool actually
tarqs 1960 to now = stupid retard get killed
oh my god i really did stuff up last weekend
based post
coincidentally 1960 was when inheritance tax was brought in
reckon i'm biologically immortal like that bloke from the man from earth (2007) and its sequel, the man from earth: holocene (2017)
my basis for this theory is that i haven't aged a day in 10 years, and i've also survived several brain aneurysms and an earnest suicide attempt
As Luke said to the Jedi Council, Jacen was the only person in the galaxy who could hold his own against Luke in a fight.
Luke wasn't being arrogant but he was just stating a fact and it showed how immensely powerful Jacen had become.
he's right you know
does anyone know what this tune is from? been trying to find out for years
vocaroo.com
When I was a teenager I wanted to remove all my pubes because I saw it in porn but instead of shaving I heard about waxing but didn’t really know what it was so I stole one of my mums tea lights and let it all melt then poured hot wax onto my pubes thinking it would somehow just make them all fall off.
They didn’t. It made a mess.
can't stop, won't stop arseing my life up
you should not have been viewing pornography
owen jones is the archetypal british journalist so this is a huge self-own
Coruscant never completely recovered from the Yuuzhan Vong invasion. Things went mostly back to normal after the war but the lower levels still had the effects of Yuuzhan Vong terraforming.
The thing about Novara Media is that it's disproportionately populated with women who have this toxic combination of being very brown, well endowed, having no modesty, being shameless sluts for BWC, having minimal clothes but also being really clever
ill be done with this strain tomorrow and it wasnt the best one to start out with, as it cant be a high priority for vaccines. it is interesting nonetheless
it isnt very high priority because of the natural progression in the persons age and their lifelong relationship with the virus possibly
Alex Jones >>> Owen Jones
do it again but in the different tone of voice, where the tone is that "derp, derpity derpderp (duderp)" song
that goes derpderp
derpy derp
Can I get any pissed with a 600 ml beverage with only 3% of alcoohol?
Today is my birthday and I wanna get wasted.
no...
Prove it
what the fuck is that post
600 ml and 3% getting wasted
HAS to be authored by some random underage kid
Tea for two cha cha.
Could be Soul Bossa Nova or Afrikaan Beat though. Can’t tell with the accent mate.
Maybe I'm just asking for God to help me by turning that 3% into 30%...
naptime for me
Yes, you can use Google's "Hum to Search" feature to find a song by humming, whistling, or singing a melody:
Open the Google app or find the Google Search widget
Tap the mic icon
Say "what's this song?" or click the "Search a song" button
Hum, whistle, or sing for 10 to 15 seconds
Google's machine learning algorithm will analyze the melody and compare it to thousands of songs to identify potential matches. You can then select a match to: Listen to the song, Read the lyrics, Watch the music video, Explore information on the song and artist, and Find other recordings of the song.
"Hum to Search" is available in English on iOS and in more than 20 languages on Android.
youre so good at that stuff anon and you have just the right amount of pride
poo sells
More like baby yank walk am I right lads?
red, hot, angry tobies :p
filtered all non cornish diaspora
currently reading?
tranny piss
tranny piss
tranny piss
going to see justice in the new year
Devastated about Storm Bert. Such a senseless tragedy.
this is my world today
I drink that
I'm a one man band.
Burping and farting!
Sloppy runny poo but ill feel better once its all out
just described himself perfectly
nettle piss
this is my world today
Why is it gay to have a lad suck you off but it’s not gay to have a wank?
Only in one of those scenarios are you grabbing and stroking a man’s cock until he cums. Which seems very gay to me.
Been offered a "zoopa doopa"
Its what australians call an ice lolly
Baffling creatures they are
OOOOOOH OHHHHHHHH
*cums and dies*
why do gay people always jump through hoops and tie themselves up in knots to pretend they're not gay? were you really that traumatised by school?
can't answer this because treating this as though it's a serious question would be gay sorry
it's not gay to have a lad suck you off
letting anyone put their mouth on your genitalia is gay
Why did my dad call me and my brother poofter freaks when he caught us then?
australians be like
"yeah i live in poowong"
australians be like
"crikey there’s a chinaman in my shoe"
sucking jam out of my knobend
australians visiting london be like
"shrimp on the barbican"
aussies be like "nawr!"
Yanks visiting london be like
"I'm a quarter Irish"
why do amerimutts think retarded sub-working class crude played out jokes with whores in them are "banter"
i hate them so very deeply much
context
youtube.com
literally is the reason we're not just a scoring game for asteroids and the reason anything can live here
useless and shit
yeah?
leave terry out of it ok
quarter Welsh me
yeah, i was mad
i think "british comedy" has a decently high bar based on things like yes minister and top gear
i'm done ranting now.
So you're a born loser?
never heard of those
bit rude tbqh
germans be like
“Ich bin angry und ich bin autistic”
You a fan of rugby?
i'm somalian-australian thoughestever
yh i played hooker in high school
new matt walsh just dropped and he's right
youtube.com
wonder what catberg is up to right now
You must love a bit of man on man contact then.
Your welsh genes showing through
poo
what's german comedy like
anyone here Australian?
Good 'dish
as a brit I can become australian any time I choose by simply changing my physical location
nawr
no you cant get fucked
Get fucked
Must be hard for the likes of you
mate come on we always treated you right dont pull the ladder up on us now please
it's true
as an anglo-saxon male I am already 1/2 australian
the other 1/2 is being over there in jolly olde terra australis
hard
Doubt he can
Just found out that if I go to Australia and don’t leave for 4 years I legally become an Australian.
Thing about Australia is that you can be a 6/10 in Britain, and if you fly to Sydney you're automatically a 10/10.
Last time I visited I was practically swimming in it
FIVE brits awake?
At this hour?
I’m an Australian now actually. Just decided
i have no idea, i'm actually australian
i can tell you krauts love puns
i'm pretty sure they write them into their wills
shut up libtard
IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME
I am GOING to do one more shift tomorrow and then I am GOING to drive straight to the parents' for a few days' hometime and I am GOING to be the guy who gets up on the ladder and gets "the christmas crap" out of the garage attic so they don't hazard their own bodies and I am GOING to help them with their computer troubles and I am GOING to do a bit of reading and it is GOING to be a peaceful, happy American Thanksgiving in which dad will, as usual, simply say that he is thankful that he is an American.
Longbottom leaf
I'm Australian, can you milk me?
in dire need of a wank but can't be arsed
reckon I'll just hold it until I'm at the hotel tonight and have a big naked moany wank on the bed, away for work this week you see
apparently the most famous australian is kylie minogue, i hadn't even heard of her
old toby
looks kino
Haven't wanked in days, simply can't be bothered
proxy paedo
you got the 'pression lad? or taking those hair growth tablets?
get the kettle boiled
Can’t sleep. Ropes are creaking and I’m worried the boat will come loose
the fuck
might blow my brains out ahaha x
Big in down syndrome community apparently (i love her)
GOOD lad. already had the kettle revved up myself, more to come and all
youtube.com
UKbros, it's here!
As a solo artist he has had a number 1 album in over 20 countries and has sold over 75 million records. He also held the Guinness World Record for most concert tickets sold in 24 hours (1.6m).
you got the 'pression lad?
yh
getting a bit packed in the /brit/ boat
mouseys been sick 3 times already
think he ate it back up
good lad
just remembered I left my tea in the kitchen, thanks for reminding me
the irony of course being that she’s got much more of a name for herself in the UK than she does here
Smeggy Poo, Smeggy Poo
Oh how my heart yearns for you
Oh Smeggy, my Smeggy Poo-oo-oo
Oh well, I love you gal, yes, I love you Smeggy Poo
been wanking a lot lately and need to calm it down I reckon, might give the depression a go and see how it works out
peter kay, amarillo
load wanktoil
sudden belgium
Because the UK is an actual place with people and culture
Australia is just a wasteland with some nice beaches. You
kek
Ah yes the cultural titan that is Kylie Monique
fucking dire that is
Adam
HNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGG!
*plops solid turd log in /brit/ with a loud splash*
Ahhhhhhhh...
must be my welsh genes
cant help it, scottish blood innit
my dear irish mother
*slurps it up instantly*
Man somebody needs to stop Conor he's spiralling
This is exactly why you don't give povvos money
*scurries over to it on all fours and gobbles it up leaving a ring of poo stain all round my gob*
hard to imagine 13 years ago fucking around with my mates on league of legends that this would turn into some interracial lesbian cartoon bullshit that for some reason nobody can shut the fuck up about
Look like he been eating chocolate ahahahaha
*dashes over and gives you a big kiss on the lips*
midgets get too much hate in the modern world
we need to go back to wholesome ginger hate
or just make fun of leprechauns
it's none of these although i can see the similarities
right thanks for the suggestion, it's called "baby elephant walk" by the by
Mary had a little lam
yes, typical of english to hate anything to do with the indigenous people of these islands. now go back to worshiping your migrants.
She tied it to a pylon
The Khabib fight broke him on a psychological level he never really recovered from
faustian
proxy paedo
donald trump said he will nuke london if saquid khan remains mayor
any of you lads shave your bumholes? sick of dingleberries
Win win innit
Fomorian niggers are the true irish natives
got lost in my own neighbourhood earlier lads, really shouldn't take drugs and then go out
why what happened
How is Trump going to do all those deportations anyway?
youtube.com
europe is evil
no lad no you shouldn’t
Fair dinkum, but mate you're about as sharp as a bowling ball. You've got a face like a dropped pie and you're ugly as a hat full of arseholes.
with canons, blast those fuckers back across the border
Didnt you already ask this
having a shaven bum can make it even worse belief it or not
bum hair prevents poo from sticking to your skin, it can get really messy if it's a particularly sticky poo, they also serve another important purpose by muffling the sound of your farts
IRL streams are not real life
oh that's a little elf fella stealing my dog's poos from the front yard innit
you’ve asked this a couple times lad, there’s a few avenues he can pursue if you’re ultimately that interested, although of course it would be quite an expensive process in terms of budget and personnel
best time 2drink is right after u woke up
youtu.be
Yeah nobody answered
That rape case finally got settled in court and he's guilty
It's not the first time he's been accused of rape but it's the first time the woman hasn't settled it outside of court
Now his sponsors are letting him go
couldn’t knock the froth off a pint this bloke
I don't really care if happens or not, I'm just curious how
surprised his wife’s remained loyal to him despite all he’s done, thought the family man thing was part of his schtick
just rolled the dodgiest darb ever, you'd think i'd never rolled one before, can't be arsed to redo it and i'm low on papers so hopefully it can maintain its structural integrity x
They're partners but they're not married
Im probably biased since im incredibly racist and sexist but i dont particularly believe or care when women cry rape a lot of the time even if its a black fella accused
surprised his partner’s stayed with him then
bruh why is this entire thread australiananas
racism is based, sexism is just not cool and makes you seem like an incel
FOJF
too many sports to keep track of
stubbornly follow rugby league and that’s it, it’s the biggest one in the country by viewership and everyone in Sydney has a team
I've never liked Conor since I don't like loud obnoxious people and since I saw that video where he suckerpunched that grandpa for not drinking his garbage alcohol. At least now I have a real reason to give to normies for why.
what
c'est la houre de poweur
I just dont trust women due to personal experience i find the vast majority of them to be untrustworthy and liars
FONC to you as well
sweet glorious autism
I'm not, people can justify almost any kind of abuse
nah he’s just saying it how it is
because its 5am bong time and its 3pm aussie time.
Fojf means fuck off jewish freak
Fonc means fuck off norwegian cunt
bodied that foreign eurofreak I did
i want a refund
crazy
naur way
at some point he’s embarrassed you to the point where you look like a complete fool
but love is a complicated thing