/BRIT/

your car sar edish

can a human willy fit in a cat
asking for a mate

We need male role models to stop that which is portrayed in the his Netflix documentary 'Adolescence'

why does rorke think he's going to be forced to eat bugs? like where did that come from?

Wish I was a primary school teacher

how was toil lads

Sir Tax Payer

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mine could but then i have a very tiny penis

heh

did you hatch yesterday?

how tiny we are talking about? mine couldnt

Netflix documentary

sad thing is people think its true.
women are more likely to be murdered by their partner than anyone else in the world.
women are terrible at selecting partners, i sort of understand why we did arranged marriages now.

Margaret Thatcher would know what to do

depends on the school
a school full of unruly pakis and niglets? no thanks

had my car washed by ethnically ambiguous immigrants at the weekend.

been audibly laughing at /brit/ today
it's just as silly as ever but it's been getting me good

Savings income

5k

they need to do an adolescence spin off about about the follow on from the incel - the obese manchild nonce. the parents are elderly and he's 30s living with them and still it's stephen graham going me son a nonce

the cronem craccing dey luh cocoa butter jars open x

in no small part due to the spammers brought to heell by Anon Babble acting as a sword of damocles hovering above their heads.

Michael Clark, 46, taught maths at Lyng Hall School in Coventry but left his job after a pupil complained about his behaviour in 2022.

A tribunal in Coventry heard he used homophobic slurs during lessons, had physical altercations with pupils and described himself as 'f***ing untouchable'.

Mr Clark also made several sexual remarks about a pupil's mother which the panel found him guilty of.

The vulgar comments included: 'I do not need to w**k off, I will just get your mum to s**g me.' Mr Clark was also said to have told a child: 'I am usually in front of your mum, not behind.' He was also alleged to have said: 'Maybe I will ring your mum up, she seems to love my phone calls.'

He was also accused of swearing in front of them, saying 'f**k' and b*****d' and 'f****t' and 'p***y.'

Mr Clark said during a 'playfight' with a student that he had 'put my foot on him like I was champion.' He returned to his class to continue teaching, and the boy later went back to his classroom and 'taunted' Mr Clark, who responded by throwing a whiteboard pen at him, the Teaching Regulation Agency (TRA) said.

Mr Clark said the incident had been sparked by the boy 'sticking his finger up, calling me a p***y, saying he would batter me, joking.' After the physical confrontation had happened, the 46-year-old is alleged to have said: 'I one-handed kicked his a**e, stood on his neck, job is a dunun, I have a tea on my arm though, it is hard to do it with one hand.'

When the allegations were put to Mr Clark during an internal investigation, the 46-year-old said: 'If that is what they are saying, then I must have.' He was also said to have fallen asleep during lessons and examinations he was supervising.

zoidberg no longer posts ai images or does his daily boot up advertisement spam anymore LOL

how much do you need to have saved to get 5k interest paid

Paying my taxes

buck broken by Anon Babble. you love to see it. nun he cud do lol

Sheffield's the steel city why didn't they save that

190 was the Bez of /brit/

All in due time.

who do you say that I am?

Dame No Savings

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aint nun zieldy cud do LOL

This is the sort of male teacher we need

Sir Friday Night Dinner

Former DJ and Top of The Pops presenter Sir Jimmy Savile and TV presenter Terry Christian attend the launch party for the "My Generation" Book Launch at the V&A Museum (2010)

bit over £110,000 assuming 4.5%

Sir Alan Carr

I took pictures of my maths teacher's arse and wanked to them when I got home

the legend of zieldy: 3 pm princess

2 more weeks and aston martin will go bankrupt

bet the yardie goons are chiefing that loud pack

Can't think of a funny name for this one

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I Wish beardmeatsfood And gary Eats would meet

that would Be
Great !!

bet you're sat there cowering and pissing yourself in your wheelchair because of Anon Babble
nun u cud do LOL

fake mosuey

can see why they accept gifts and bribes tbf people seem to think they earn loads but that's fuck all

Mrs Audiobook Narrator

cronem got they s bend batons in zieldy
aint nun he cud do

the female version of a incel is a girl who acts slutty and gets sent to a reform school and comes back with a drug problem or on a field trip to africa and comes back pregnant

wish i could shag that one fit fnaf animatronic

The shag of 87

couldnt be arsed

There are those who want a swimming pool in the house, while those who have one barely use it.

the female version of a incel

no such thing, there is no equivlency

bandem got zieldy done
aint nun he cud do

shoving sultanas down the ol jappers

yeah but the yardie goons they're putting dey luh airmasses on

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there are those who want a pizza hut in the garage, while those who have one-LOOK YOU BIG EARED FREERF

How many times do you have to wear shoes before they're 'worn in' and fit your feet properly? I've worn a pair of boots two times and both times it's left blisters on my feet and one of my toenails cut off and bleeding too. WHEN DOES IT END

might play some elite dangerous

One day

Only just clocked that 'sacked tranny' is a derogatory nickname for the employed woman tripfag.

Thought they were two different posters.

Funny nickname

just buy some jordans LOL

And the latest from the Anon Babble separatists?

should have bought some shoes that fit you

Very vague

One may expect it to take approximately three to four weeks of regular wear for shoes to become properly "worn in" and to conform to the shape of one's feet, though this may vary depending upon the material and construction of the footwear.

Those aren't going to 'wear in' lad. They don't fit you.

might just

lovely iron
probably the GOAT element

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317x10000

not a chance

Partial to Arsenic myself.

sleeps in bins for comfort

The dispute centres around the council's decision to remove Waste Recycling and Collection Officer (WRCO) roles.

This role, which is responsible for safety at the back of a refuse collection lorry, has been carried out by around 170 workers, some of which have been with the city’s waste collection services for over 30 years. Birmingham City Council is the only local authority in the country to have this role.

Birmingham City Council claimed Unite's proposals focused on retaining a role that did not exist at other councils and could open up the council to more equal pay claims as refuse collection is a job overwhelmingly performed by men.

Wait all this is all over a role, done by 170 people, some of who have been doing it for 3 decades, and Birmingham council is the only one in the country that even has this WRCO job? And the Council's reason for axing it is "too many binmen are men" and they can train to be HGV drivers instead? Oh this shit will never be settled.

ive suffered with blisters for 90% of the shit childs trainers that i wear

rorke is to blame for jamie bulger getting raped by those 2 lads. if rorke had just accepted their gayness they wouldnt have has to ill the wee lad

not in order of most iron content to least

i ingest enough rust as a steel worker

Shoes should fit comfortably from day one and never cause blisters from normal walking activity.

Stop buying ill fitting shoes

OCD freak!

me? Got nostalgia for the song "Starships" by Nicki Minaj

nahhhhhhhhhh rorke

rorke in his 5 year old NB creps

For me, it's superbass

I don't know about jobs or tax but does that say she made 85k and pays 21k in tax

isn't that a lot

that too, but Starships moreso

well that's a bit grim isn't it now

That is not ok

yes boys, get that iron in

quite liked that me

Obese woman. White discharge.

Disgusting

Dear Our Client

Grim, even a high street bank will call you by your name

always got the plapcow wall decoration havent they?

that's a fat woman's fanny then

WHY DO THEY ALL HAVE THE SAME WALL ART

timmy's wife

Sir Our Client

samefag

It should really read 'Dear Client'

night shift toil in 1 hour

used to goon to her music videos

just dont go

honestly mate i'm a bit gay myself but 90% of minges are just nasty to look at. love everything else about a womans body but fuck me are they NASTY looking.

Wish I worked in a highly dangerous laboratory surrounded by extremely volatile and poisonous chemicals.

Akon - I wanna love you

Most goons had for me

mental how a feminine cock and balls are so much more pleasing to my cock than a pussy but a pussy is much more pleasing to my cock physically, whereas a cock and balls is impossible to penetrate

the 3 pm ones tend to look nice

Sabrina Carpenter very sexy

Best I cud get.

not got mental health me. lifting weights and having a routine got rid of it

poo arse wank

good on you mate, we must all combat mental health at all costs and ensure no one ever has mental health ever again

when I lift weights I forget that I'm gay

PREACH!

well i cant do that i need money

God works in mysterious ways

wtf the minge is the best part.
Maybe except for Hope Solo’s vag

teared up reading this ngl. Cant believe all the lads with mental health. it not right x

You need mental health!

they are just nasty to look at, that's all mate.
its like god spent an hour designing a woman and spend the final minute doing the sexual organs.

if your worried, just don't worry mate

good post. not gay myself but most fannies are a bit grim

aff to Anon Babble
see you in a bit

Sex

New

satan personified telling lads to get mental health and jump in front of trains, not on

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

cant believe you'd wish mental health on me

could someone please wanj me orf

That's mentally unhealthy ACTUALLY!

Marie Laforêt

dogs eating the cat food again

mining lithium in my own backyard

rorke's mum buying him 3 pairs of trousers in 3 shades of brown on her Very credit account

nobody has worn brown trousers since the 1970s

Back garden*

Rorke's mum being like "I am your mum" to Rorke

exactly

addicted to redbull
tastes so yummy

*quickly takes off my brown trousers and throws them in a bush*
yeah exactly

rorke: my mum is my mummy! (to the tune of, my life is a movie!)

Don't test me. I'd wreck you on DayZ

watching an enthralling kurosawa film

desuarchive.org/int/thread/209850737/

this thread will forever be a reminder of how rattled spammers got when Anon Babblebrit killed int/brit/

chuckling at this one lad hahah x

And then his mum comes in and fucks him or something

guys ive been working for a week after NEETing for two years and it is hell, when does it get better?

Listen lads I need one of you to come into my smelly childhood bedroom and wank me off really quickly

when you start shagging toilfu

wont get better, it will get worse. the novelty of doing something new will wear off real fast and you'll grow it hate it.

thanks for being supportive mate got mental health so it was difficult to put myself out there with a joke glad it landed well aha x

It doesn't
There is nothing in life that makes up for the pain and the toil and the boredom

in about 4-6 years

shame Anon Babble brit is so slow, i guess brit just belongs on Anon Babble

lol it doesn't
THAT'S WHAT THE MONEY IS FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR

Nay

in the /brit/ kitchen today we will be serving elton john ice cream

Remember everything you know

gets better when you stop caring and just shoot the shit with the lads all day and flirt with your toilfu in the kitchenette

pangpang buying jewellery with timmy's funds

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me finally understanding a joke someone at work makes

Oh ha ha I didn't see the name of the jif

what do I do if mum spent £40 on something for me which doesn't fit my figure and cannot be returned
she's my darling mum and I can't just throw it away

change your figure

this is so true bros, take me back

deport millions of wogs

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thank her for it and put it on vinted

UK is collapsing faster than any other western country. I hope the worst to you all. Karma is finally catching up to you.

1. It's not happening.
2. It is happening, but it's very rare.
3. It's happening, and that's a good thing.
4. It's happening and you'd better shut up about it, or else.

Loving the bant thread. It's giving me a guide to stay in character all thread and then change it the next one.

/brit/ but in podcast form

toilfu is into manifesting

/britfeel/ had a podcast at one point
it was an utter cringefest

Your people live in shanty towns made out of cinder blocks with monkeys climbing up the telephone poles.

poodcast

find it too restricting, me. want to post what I want without any care for maintaining consistency across posts

/|brit/| but in book form

/britfeel/ had a podcast at one point

omds that just unlocked a memory.
were the episodes archived?

wasn't moni hosting it or some shite

Everything about /britfeel/ is pure cringe

He made his own I think

Top 27 Most Disturbing /brit/ Posts Of All Time

pooing a wank out of my pooey arse

Number 7 Will Shock You

Proving my point.

I must say I did find it funny how they had a sponsor from audible one time but audible retracted their sponsorship immediately afterwards.

watching Zlewikk CRUSH the Three Mountains achievement by playing a Mughals run omdzzzzz and he's taken the Mandate of Heaven too

number 12: cock

sponsor from audible one time but audible retracted their sponsorship immediately afterwards.

How do you sleep at night?

miss my ex girlfriend so so so much I think about her every single day and dream about her every night

number 15: burger king foot lettuce

In my Cars 2 bed

On my right side with my eyes closed.

in a clinical waste bin

I have a lifelong obsession with Sharks. And if you need a little Monday boost, here is my favourite shark-related quote for you:

Sharks don't complain about Mondays.

They're up early.

Biting stuff.
Chasing things.
Being scary.

Reminding everything they are a shark.

Relentless. Focused. Always moving forward.

Happy Monday!

keep it on linkedin next time

Why did he do it lads?

that really rattled them

someone found her profile years later and she has CHAD 7ft athlete bf while he trooned out

increasingly poorly given

foreigners racing their motorbikes down the main road

police sirens blaring regularly (policing foreigners)

mentally ill (foreign) neighbour up to nonsense in the garden

So you have just forked out on a brand new Aston......

You are in the pub and its bragging rights time.....

Your mates think your a plonker cos you should have bought Porsche, Fezza or Audi....

No. you stuck to buying a great hand-made, British made Aston, with a century of skill and knowledge passed down the generations. The quintessential British automobile......

You show then the fine lines of the exterior....

Then the exquisite interior of a proper gentlemans car.....

You start it up, and with the roar, your mates are indeed very impressed.

Then one asks.....go on then, let's see the engine.....and you do.

Then at the peak of British pride with superlative design and engineering of the home-grown definitive GT they see.....

please find me a source for this

what does poo taste like?

Wtf you're turning balkan

It not right is it, men and women co-toiling

I'm married. My female co-toiler is married. Yet I've fallen in love with her.

All because I spend more time with her in a day than I do my own wife.

Hope Trump reverses womens rights.

Like shit

Unfortunately, Katy Perry has returned from space. The 11 minute trip lasted longer than "143" was in the charts.

Unsurprising. That vid was a literal life ruiner.

Remember Change UK?
What were that all about?

mikey will be posting here a lot more now
He has a new computer with a Pentium processor and a keyboard

I'm working class but I don't want a working class gf
they're animals
I DESERVE a middle class gf

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All I remember is that pic if them eating in nandos

wahey mikey moving on up in the world

limp wristed centrist poofters who thought the lib dems were too spicy for their taste

Right, so you saw the image of them I posted the other day, didn't give me a single (You), yet used my work to inspire your own post.
Absolutely disgusting. Fuck you man.

They see the engine and go "phwoarr that's pretty nice"

Because unlike you they leave their bedrooms and don't obsess about brown people all the time

The Last of Us is such cucked dogshit

protag is a 5'1 45kg girl who regularly kills 100kg+ zombies in hand-to-hand combat

side character is another dyke woman also predisposed and gifted in combat

pro immigrant rhetoric forced into plot

Change UK, founded as The Independent Group (TIG) and later The Independent Group for Change, was a British centrist, pro–European Union political party, which lasted for ten months in 2019. Established in February and formally recognized as a party in May, it was dissolved in December after all its MPs lost their seats at that year's general election.

need a british gf

it was dissolved in December after all its MPs lost their seats at that year's general election.

she's south african

Oh get a life

it was dissolved in December after all its MPs lost their seats at that year's general election.

abby's not even a muscle mommy in the show
what's the point?

the new fire alarm chirp is a black person riding a lime bike without paying for it (causes it to emit a chirping noise)

very common in London, always non-whites doing it

earns less than me

Can't even look me in the eye you absolute coward

reckon i'm the only white young british bloke in my shithole town
genuinely think even the pakis at the shops feel sorry for me

genuinely think even the pakis at the shops feel sorry for me

ktim

things are going to get ugly soon

the dobster could get it

How many candles are you burning

gerards dead mark

images.jpg - 299x169, 4.56K

Currently lifting.

she was very fit in man down

yer lifting mate jk xx

yeah a fork full of pot noodle doesn't count mate

Party membership:

Independent (2019)

Change UK (2019)

Liberal Democrats (2019–2023)

Labour Co-op (2023-present)

In December 2024, it was announced that Berger would be made a Life Peer as part of the 2024 Political Peerages.[110] She was created Baroness Berger, of Barnhill in the London Borough of Brent on 6 February 2025.[111]

Only think I'd like to 'change' about the uk is all these fucking pakistanis, indians and africans comin in

I’m full of self-loathing and regret

Just heard Rorke is on Tesco Mobile

Job for life if you're from the right stock

Reacting to the killings of a number of children by dangerous dogs and the attacks leading to injuries of 5,000 postmen and women a year, she proposed allowing police to take action on private property, produce dog control notices, and instigate compulsory micro-chipping, so that dogs and their owners can be traced more easily

I might be the most miserable person on earth

yeah apart from that it's brilliant

move then

corrr she had the perfect arsehole

Never had sex or a gf and I'm 33
How do I learn to be romantic when teenagers have more experience in it than I do

tesco mobile

barclays.png - 700x350, 495.63K

it is
this place has the potential to be one of the best places in the world to live

get the aston martins inspected x

shitco shitbile mote like

new