Visit Kashmir
/brit/
*hffghghffbbbt*
In the year 3047, Earth’s last hope rests on the crew of the spaceship SS. Libido-7, tasked with repopulating a distant planet after humanity becomes mysteriously sterile. The crew includes:
(You), a roguish pilot with a "need for speed" (and other things).
Dr.Ava Addams (Picture related), a brilliant but "distractingly flexible" astrobiologist.
Engineer Tyrone "11 Inch" Johnson, whose "tools" are always fully charged.
A.I. Companion """Employed ""Woman""" a sultry-voiced robot who "overheats" during critical moments.
The mission goes awry when the crew accidentally inhales space pollen from an alien plant called the Orchid of Desire, which causes "rapid hormonal escalation" (everyone loses their clothes). To survive, they must "collaborate closely" to cultivate an antidote from the plant’s "essence".
What do you do?
peng
squattoil this afternoon
ford only sells 1 car in the US, and it's the mustang
north india and pakistan is insanely peng and apparently everyones more chill up there, id like to visit some time
The bona fide /brit/ new, as it were.
Just posted in an old thread, been done you see
this is 40,000 years old. your smelly freakcel exsistance is nothing in the story of humanity.
wrong. they sell the ford ranger
air force gone
don't understand people who don't like pickles on a hamburger
they're wrong at a very minimum, weird at best, and deserving of a slow painful death at worst
A.I. Companion """Employed ""Woman"""
Your parents after they find out what you've been posting here
Sven GORAN Ericsson
You don't need more
that's a pickup truck
del GATO
ok... THIS is literally me
that 40,000 years is made up of millions of smelly freak existences
had squattoil today but i skipped it because my lower back was acting up
/brit/ is like Futurama
Diego is Bender
Mousey is Professor Farnsworth
Spaino is Zoidberg
Poley is Apu
same lad been watching videos of someone on a trip there and everyone is proper friendly. only thing is everywhere in india looks so fucking hectic there doesn't look like there's anywhere with peace and quiet
everyone is white
huh..
My dream car? For me, it's a UK-built Ford Mustang.
must be at least a size 22 in that box
me own son... posting about poo and trannies on /brit/...me own blood. how could this have happened
It was fed by the ‘‘Roaring Meg’’
screaming
GIB
that's shite though I could build something better and I'm a spaz
mental how they try to run this grift of a loving father just trying to do his best for his son when its usually boys from a single mother household who go around murdering.
Sir Keir Starmer
Should be seized by Aryan conquerors and resettled by whites.
It's wrong that such land is in the hands of browns.
;-( inactive for 5 years
youtube.com
can't believe i was 16 when skyrim came out, the peak target audience at the time, and now i'm a 30 year old boomer and 16 year old zoomers are still playing skyrim today
gives me the fear to be honest
same with minecraft actually
me own son... posting early news
mental how some blokes made a living by heating up metal and repeatedly hitting it
I come from a single mother's home and I turned out perfectly normal.
The Shoreditch Scenester to Surry Hills Retiree pipeline.
why are you posting this
Yeah it's mad, I was 15 when Skyrim came out, everyone in school was obsessed with it
Mind boggling there hasn't been an Elder Scrolls game since then
I know a guy so this proves the evidence wrong
blog on
gaming never progressed past it
bet skyrim 2 will be shit
Rorke playing Skyrim with 3500 mods
Skyrim sex arse mod
bethesda has been making the same game for decades
just with different coats of paint
there was nothing to progress past it mate, the game was already regressed from the previous installments.
fuck up rorke man go outside for a change
skyrim sex mods try on haul
this necklace was made 130,000 years ago. it wasn't even made by our species. your freakcel existance means nothing. you will be a speck of dust blown away into insignificance.
cant be arsed to change the clock on the oven
Sir Skyrim Modder
Gaming was a solved problem with Skyrim. They started playing with their food a bit with Gamergate and the industry never recovered.
t. Industry Insider
good
please stop calling me a freakcel
My dad works at Nintendo
walk into your mates cafes outside room
see this looking back at you
"I've been very lonely since my husband died anon, I've been looking for a strong young man to help me through this difficult time"
in the midst of an utterly catastrophic toe-curler of a poo
Rorke siding with the empire then genociding the high elves
my dad unironically worked on LA Noire
mental that emails were leaked exposing the top US government officials and billionaires of child trafficking and it was completely forgotten about, and then epstein came along and even more proof of all these elites nonce and trafficking activities and all that was forgotten about too
why is everyone so happy living in a society controlled by wronguns?
My dad works in a primary school
i found this in a chest in a cave in cyrodiil
tell her that my labour services wont be so cheap
mumberg just brought an Easter egg home from the shops
doing what
this was made 71 years ago. your freakcel existence is and always will be unremarkable
all you do is wake up and jack off to images of white women getting fu*ked by black men, it's a fucking sad reality mate
is it fair to say Skyrim was Nietzschean and Faustian?
leftypol falling in love with serana
For the socially awkward meek Timmy coward shrews in the thread; watch Frasier, watch Mad Men, watch American Psycho. Replicate the mannerisms, the body language, the facial expressions. Read Celine, Evola, Prozac Nation. Watch 2012-2015 VICE documentaries. Wear American Apparel. Matriculate to Durham University. Rock vintage designer only. Plot a New York trip. Gain a clue.
3pm footy
ubereats
bet365
just got called a speccy cunt
i dont even wear glasses
tell him to finish the game sometime
toilet cleaner
never happened grow up
they could see through to your speccy soul
?? i only watch sissy porn orgasm hands free pal
Wanna goon on discord with me
spend your entire life pretending to be a character from a TV show for a crumb of pussy
nah im good
what ahppens at duram university
African tribesmen knocking about in Rorke’s anime t shirts after he died prematurely and his mum donated them to Oxfam.
too many fat peopel around these days
need that sorting out pronto
Might get on the 'craft
howling
watch Frasier, watch Mad Men, watch American Psycho
Based.
no thanks bit gay that
Imagine being a grown man and getting excited to blog about your mother buying chocolate
where's 190
I just can't stop stuffing my fat fucking cunting face
its aryan as fuck mate
but sissy porn isnt?
if you're fat an upset about it then exercise. if you are not willing to exercise then use the new weightloss drugs
if you're fat an upset about it then exercise
can’t be arsed
new drugs
too expensive
now what, genius?
Just stop being fat
go use a stem and leaf diagram
One of my biggest secrets in life I'll take to my grave is during COVID I made friends with a programmer from China and it eventually spiralled into a relationship as I thought he was a girl. But he turned out to be a sissy fetish type and he would dress up as a girl for me and we would goon for hours before cumming. I left Discord, went to college, got a job, and got arranged married to a girl from a orthodox Hindu family. Sometimes I still think about his cock and our relationship.
Put the fork down
If you rock American Apparel and do your very best VICE documentarian impression as you party at Durham University you will have a very good time. Trust me.
paki faggot
would have an all day goon session but deleted my discord account and left all 30 goon servers I was in after realizing the sad state of my life and now I can't be bothered joining them all again
here is the video i was talking about yesterday
ava addams
redgifs.com
My mum only buys me an easter egg for the actual weekend of Easter, before that she just buys little treats like the crème eggs, egg n spoon, maktesers rabbits etc
we all make mistakes with lust etc in the modern day. we should probably focus on Christ our Lord who died for our Sins
In 24 hours, I’ll be ~6 hours into a 36 hour goonathon and deeeeep in my gooncave
Physically, I’m still at work, sending emails and trading chats and clicking those keys.
Mentally, I’m 24 hours in the future, deep in my goon cave, and I’m already 100mg+ of edibles and dozens of bong rips and pen hits in, and gooned the FUCK out to endless, filthy porn, on two large TV’s, a projector on the wall, and tablet in front of me, goonstick aching for release from fucking my fleshlight all goddamn day, and I’m gonna keep going until midnight.
I can’t wait to fall down the discord+Reddit goon hole and not look back for a whole day and a half.
NNNNNGGGHHHHHHH
is she fit
we all make mistakes
Mot me
yh because you can always self insert as the penetrator
bit sad that
get the tor browser fired up
CAUSE IM TOO MESSY
yh she’s quite pretty for her age
i was talking about yesterday
and what were you talking about?
got to be at toil by 2pm but i dont want to toil today
*the ghost of Elizabeth Wurtzel visits you in your Hoxton house share paid for by your parents*
tick tock….. tick tock :)
don't watch me goon, i may not cum
i won't watch you goon, i may go soft
just be in my discord channel, gooning together
can't believe paddy mcguinness has a career
India is a highly multilingual country, home to 121 languages
mad
whats the name of that big titty tranny that gets posted here?
Dogberg lying on top of me
Lots of people walking about with their Minecraft hats on today and yesterday
suzy eddie izzard
would honestly clobber all of you to death
I plan on whipping out my cock on a NSFW HMV goon discord server
if my power does not go out again
heheheheh
you couldn't stir a cup of tea
devilish: buy mint and put it in the dirt outside your house
Why
that's stealing
*slowly creeps in and snatches the copy of Peng Gay Porn Weekly off the thread coffee table*
*slinks off to the thread masturbatorium*
shut up
middle aged fanny
shut up
wee rorkeypops
that bird in that nationwide advert is fit
ever shagged her
liquid air
latest on that haaland mascot incident?
if air was fluorinated maybe
you couldn't fight your way out of a paper bag you runty little gimp
anyone got the /brit/ goon squad discord?
yeh
kemi badenNO
how can humans get vitamin d from the sun. they dont photosynthesise. it's literally not possible to get nutrients from the sun
more like if air had gaseous piss in it
were descended from annunaki
NNOOOO YOU CAN'T JUST GOON FOR 10 MINUTES
STOP STOP YOU NEED TO GOON AT LEAST 6 HOURS
i can photosynthesise actually
does anyone ACTUALLY goon or is it a meme? I can't imagine wanking for hours at a time, must be really bad for the willard
horse
crazy drama in the bloons tower defense gooning community this week
I’ve done it before. Not bad desu hours just fly by, I can see why freaks get addicted to it
feels like we're living at the crescendo of a specific era of human history lads, that moment just before it all goes to shit
horse girl gf
takes me 40-50 minutes to cum with this medicine i started and im considering quitting because it takes too long. anything longer than that is actually mental
thats just called having a wank mate
Having a snack. S'alright
siri,
I've fallen into the gooning trap a couple times and felt like death shit with physically painful balls, god knows how some nutters do it regularly
you should eat some celery
i ate some carrots and a banana :3
Tidy your room
ummm what's this medicine?
estrogen
this is the exact same as the black woman version of him from "no country for old men"
used to do it when i was addicted to mephedrone and speed
rancid stuff, does you no good that muck
never again
an evil ghoulish presence permeates the thread
done it for years, don't do it for as long now though (down to 2-4 hours)
The man of weak constitution is wireheads himself in his pleasure pit.
what's the difference between gooning and edging?
how big are your tits
imagine how many televisionsn EPCOT would have to buy
gooning is just an updated term
gooners cum as many times as they like
might edge the borders
imagining
Clean your room
might stretch my arse over the border and poo on Russia
cor that coffee was lush
coffee is brewing
pooed in that lads coffee
poo for palestine
You post here
pooberge
Anyway, free Lucy Letby
ever get so hungry that you cant be bothered to go and make food? yeah
Thomas Müller, German GOAT. End of an era.
what is take aways
black men
most days i just have a nap instead
Peng. Used to work with a muslim girl from there who said she'd be arrested by the government if she went back but would keep posting anti-India stuff on Facebook. Her visa ran out and she was deported back. Dunno what happened to her
thinly-veiled black men post
a waste of money for a sub par meal
POO
O
O
was gonna go for a drive just to get out of the house but dont think i can be bothered
incredibly boring sunday
jsut drnak poo coffe
What kind of job was it?
raped 25 hindus
like his yoghurts
Lock her up
rhea ripley
Call centre thing (I was a different department and more senior)
starting to feel human again
catberg with his hat on :)
Part of a train carriage was trashed with crushed crisps in an act described as "disgraceful" by other passengers. The incident happened on the 10.10pm train from Brighton to Portsmouth Harbour last night (Saturday, April 5).
Looking good ;)
I've done it for days at a time.
might play that inZOI game
just leave the doors open for a bit. pigeons will clean it out
many are saying i'm off to the cinema soon
better crushed crisps than soiled shorts
One of the group sat down to eat some Cool Original Doritos with a pot of salsa when a man they were with punched the bag, sending crumbs flying.
He then grabbed the bag of crisps and started swinging it around the carriage.
This led to an altercation whereby the man started repeatedly pushing the man who took his crisps.
As a result, other passengers moved to a different carriage to avoid getting caught up in what was happening.
The end result left the carriage covered in crushed nachos, particularly outside the toilet cubicle.
The incident left other travellers incredulous, with one describing the group's actions as "disgraceful".
hats for cats now is it
has the entire planet gone woke
One of the group sat down to eat some Cool Original Doritos with a pot of salsa when a man they were with punched the bag, sending crumbs flying.
He then grabbed the bag of crisps and started swinging it around the carriage.
This led to an altercation whereby the man started repeatedly pushing the man who took his crisps.
As a result, other passengers moved to a different carriage to avoid getting caught up in what was happening.
The end result left the carriage covered in crushed nachos, particularly outside the toilet cubicle.
The incident left other travellers incredulous, with one describing the group's actions as "disgraceful".
Subhuman behaviour desu. Even nogs don't act like this
any recommendations for games that will run on a 6 yr old mid range pc? need something to get stuck into
would honestly clobber all of you to death
Game called life m8
Get a clue and start living it. There's a real world out there for the taking
ye pornhub. you play it with a joystick
Salsa, on a train, world's gone mad
omg qt
Skyrim
Moni wtf
the 'bab as it were
anything older than that
catberg having a little cat dream on my bed next to me
Lovely view outside my bedroom window today
my dream is that one day spontaneous sex with strangers becomes so normalised that girls will just casually offer their arses to you mid conversation
gf sent me a good morning text and ive yet to respond to it
why am i like this
when we're not together i don't have much interest in interacting with her, it all feels so make and meaningless in comparison
gently brush his toes whiskers and ears to see it start twitching
mad that this is a real photo
Gooning implies some level of humiliation and debasement over the act, whereas edging is just plain prolonging arousal/pleasure.
Same reason why race kinks and cuckolding etc have become more popular in recent years, because zoomers can't have any kink without including their enormous self-loathing.
Thanks
imagine the smell
That's just a salad mate
edging is based
gooning is cringe
Rorke the Elder
You live in California in 1998?
Based Ugg's sabrecat cavesona OC
Being a furfag is a natural part of the human condition we used to accept and spiritually understand. Modern people are the exception for thinking we are above and outside of nature.
where's the april showers then?
this is how I feel every time, don't think I'll ever be able to maintain a healthy relationship because I will always just be in it for the shagging
Just sharing a photo. No need for abuse
April golden showers
read an erotica novel like this, the main character eventually became jaded because everyone was fucking at all times and he found it hard to make an emotional connection. he would be talking to someone and it could turn into fucking mid conversation. people assigned no emotional value to sex so it was basically a huge polygamous society and no one was exclusive and he was seen as weird for wanting to eventually be exclusive
What do you do in it?
What a fag
my 10 year old PC works fine with most new releases, playing Elden ring rn just fine
never been clubbing
what do you do?
some girl at work has invited me to go next weekend
im worried i wont even be let in
Drinking coffee out of my $100,000,000,000,000 mug
here mate
youtube.com
this should explain it
i think you would be offended after 2 weeks if the girl you just casually fucked was constantly fucking everyone else as well, even if going in you knew it meant very little i think humans cant help but get attached a little each time
reckon that would just end with great queues of men violently gangbanging the most attractive women 24hrs a day
Doubt it
a mug can't cost that much it's literally impossible. it would need to come from rare deep space rock metals with the world's first AGI tech installed too
good to see /brit/ is still attracting fresh blood
you're a mug
Same. People say "you're just not that into her" but what if I'm just not that into anyone?
I'm sure I'm not gay, I find only women attractive, no weird fetishes, I just can't develop romantic feelings or attachments. I used to have crushes when younger, but it's like that part of me just died
youll be let in lad unless its an exclusive london club they dont actually care at all, they just want to sell overpriced drinks
youll shuffle around on an overcrowded dancefloor, you may enjoy it if you get very drunk but honestly you need to be smashed to enjoy it unless you are female/a top shagger
id recommend not going if you dont like loud noise/getting extreamly drunk/ crowed spaces with no talking, but if this girl from work has signalled she will give you pussy if you go with her it may be worth it. Remember any girl who goes clubbing has at least a 30+ bodycount thought
But I'd be casually fucking people too. Like it would be the same way you just shake hands or say "hey how you doing" with people now.
It would mean sex was devoid of emotional connection but in my experience that emotional connection can fuck you up just as much as the lack of it. Bit emo I know but that's how it goes innit
i know it's just a mug with text on it. you got done by my rouse
it's literally my kink, and I can't be the only one because it's a whole subgenre of porn. Don't why but girls allowing me to freely use their holes turns me on
you'd be bored after 6 months, devasted after another 6 when you develop a crush and have to witness her shagging constantly, in 12 months after that you would be a societal hermit
i think somebody wrote a book about that
think my new hobby will be repairing old bicycles
just realised in this theoretical ultra casual sex future you would be constantly bummed by mincers as well
no you didnt
You have a few drinks and ideally take a few lines to get yourself feeling a bit more outgoing, then you dance to crap tunes in a way that's ironic at first but deep down it's not ironic at all you just actually genuinely enjoy flailing your limbs about like a tit with other people around and not caring, it's a very liberating experience. When you have had a bit more to drink and a few more lines you make friends with random strangers in the smoking area, the ritual is generally either you ask them for a fag or they ask you for one and then when you have that fag together you are allowed to converse.
It's great fun to do once every couple of months but nowadays nobody has the money to be doing it every weekend like we used to back in the 00s. Shame.
TL;DR get drunk and coked up and be social instead of a sperg.
Consent would still exist surely
no you can refuse but its seen as impolite
No, the point is that if you grow up socially conditioned to think it's normal you wouldn't actually be bothered about it.
Instead society would have some other kind of norm for exclusivity, like you can fuck as many other grills as much as you want but you only show your feet to the partner you are "special" with or some shit.
how impolite? like talking in the cinema impolite?